Some Lovable Jokers Had A Lot Of Fun With Peter Dutton’s Wikipedia Page
"It has been speculated that Peter Dutton does not have all the regular organs a surgeon would expect to find."
Old Peter Dutton, famed for running Australia’s concentration camps and for being a bit of a dickhead, just cannot catch a break! Sad.
Not only did a mischievous swamp witch replace his heart with a handful of raisins, but he also just had a crack at becoming Prime Minister and he gone done failed. Ouch!
But to add some Himalayan rock salt to the wound, some online tricksters went and meddled with his Wikipedia page, adding some colourful embellishments. It’s unfortunately been changed back to its more-vanilla-yet-equally-horrifying-“truth”, but luckily we have screenshots.
“Peter Dutton was created in a laboratory in the northern Brisbane suburb of Boondall,” the edited article begins, giving us a good idea of the general tone of the changes.
It continues, spinning an interesting tale of a horrible monster who rises through the ranks to end up contesting the prime ministership. Wait, maybe this hasn’t been edited after all?
“Dutton soon made the vat his home as a gestational being, and soon was strong enough to scare the other animals in the laboratory with his soulless dead eyes.”
It also talked about his time in the police force, where “instructors were struck by his glowing artificial face covering and lack of all empathy.” Cool!
It all continues along in much the same vein, touching on his second job where he (allegedly) tortured kittens with his father.
It’s funny, because he is a genuinely awful person, who deserves to be mocked in any way available to us. The humour might warm us through the dark days of having to actually consider him a potential Prime Minister. Have a read! It might make you laugh.
— Kate Doolan (@crocodilekatie) August 20, 2018