Marge Simpson has always had a bad rap, and gang, it’s only gotten worse over the past few years.

Compared to the woman who brought Burns to his knees with a mutant fish, Marge 2017 is a shadow of her former self. Last year, sex with her was used to turn Homer away from Trump. Go back another year, and she split with Homer not because of his litany of personal failures but because of narcolepsy — something he has zero control over.

If you don’t watch the show anymore (that’s fair), you might be more familiar with last year’s viral poem from BoJack Horseman creator Raphael Bob-Waksberg. Over 15 tweets, Bob-Waksberg spelled out what he imagined as Marge’s depressing inner life and possible friendship with Maude Flanders. A heartbreaking take on a popular cartoon character, it naturally blew the fuck up on the internet.

And even going by the only seasons that really count (three-nine), much of this vision of Marge has weight. She’s has always been a little bit tragic, kind of unpopular, and yes, absolutely mistreated by Homer (who, let’s face it, is at best neglectful and at worst emotionally manipulative).

But as beautiful as Bob-Waksberg’s poem was, and however justifiable the recent depictions are as a byproduct of the show’s general decline, the idea of Marge as a loser is complete and utter bupkiss.

Marge Simpson is no Maude Flanders. Marge is a fucking hero, and one way or another her (mostly terrible) family and friends know it. Honestly, can you imagine anyone else on that show, except for her rarely-seen BFF Ruth Powers, burning their bra in college?

Marge is not only cooler than Maude Flanders; she’s a hell of a lot cooler than she’s ever been given credit for.

Marge Does Everything

Let’s start with the low-hanging fruit: Marge has 28 seasons as a cartoon character under her belt. This means she has, almost by requirement, lived every single life available to her, save for her much-hyped time as a robot (for now).

So while homemaking is already a full-time — sadly thankless — job (especially in that goddamn house, seriously Marge get out) she has also found the time to engage in roughly 1,000 different careers.

There is no earthly way to include them all here, but the hits include: police officer, stage actor, author, Listen Lady, prison art teacher, founder of a women’s gym, power plant worker, demolition derby driver, bodybuilder, real estate agent, pretzel wagon operator, and painter for Mr Burns (paid), Ringo Starr (gifted), and Jasper Jones (stolen).

Unlike Homer’s time in space or even Bart’s very successful factory, Marge has also both worked towards and wanted her many out-of-home successes. She studied art, passed that real estate test and, despite not finding the door, otherwise fucking crushed that cop exam.

And sure, status quo rules supreme on TV, but status quo for Marge is, a) homemaker, an unbelievably difficult job she feels both passion and pride for; b) having more successful books, artworks and businesses under her belt than anyone else on the show; and c) time for insane adventures every other week.

Marge Is Beloved By Springfield

A Springfield without Marge would fall apart within weeks. Can anyone living or dead say the same for their terrible, terrible home town?

This is not mere opinion, or even a very good guestimate: she’s the only one to see through the beautiful Monorail lie, she’s saved Homer’s life at least 20 times over, and, when Marge is put in chains in ‘Marge In Chains’, it’s only matter of time until Springfield burns.

And sure, the statue of history’s greatest monster Jimmy Carter was always going to cause a riot, but even Maude had to admit that it all started because they sent a certain someone off to jail (for an extremely minor, accidental shoplifting offence no less).

Not that people should need an entire town depending on them to feel good (cough cough, It’s A Wonderful Life), but still: Marge is the only thing between Springfield and certain doom, and she’s not even a dick about it. Or her terrible new Jimmy-Carter-mashup statue, which she is nice enough to compliment.

And as people rightly pointed out in response to Bob-Waksberg’s poem, Marge is, in addition to important, an outwardly cool person; she’s cheerful, intelligent and, while kind of daggy, extremely quick to make friends.

She bonds instantly with Ruth Powers, the undisputed coolest Simpsons character, and is even well-liked by those country club one-percenters. Even that one with the not-at-all-personal goal of destroying her.

Maude Flanders was a square, fear/mongering Christian and Marge is a cool, liberal friend and artist, they would never be mates, stop this.

— Peter Taggart (@petertaggart) August 19, 2016

The only reason Marge doesn’t have swarms of fans?

This fucker right here:

But that’s not actually a problem for Marge, because…

Marge Adores Her Awful, Garbage Family

Now, this could have all gone down the “Marge just has to leave her family” route, and I’m not going to lie: that is long, long overdue imo.

But that’s not a likely, or at least permanent, option, and only partly because this is TV-land. Not only does Marge have an ungodly amount of achievements under her belt, and a central, altruistic role in her community, but she loves every single member of her trash family.

Marge gives up that country club not because she’s unambitious, but because it was changing what she liked about the gang. “Homey, I like your in-your-face humanity,” she said at the gates of the club. “I like the way Lisa speaks her mind. I like Bart’s… I like Bart.”

And sure, she’s way, way too good for Homer (and that absolutely speaks to society’s shitty gender expectations), but there’s also a reason she chose him: Homer is fun.

His sheer presence invokes excitement, he’ll kill for Marge (“please let me kill for you Marge”), and she, in return, will wreck you if you hurt his feelings.

And not only does Marge constantly see the good in Bart (no easy task, he’s a nightmare!), she manages to see the child in Lisa, a more complicated and arguably more difficult job considering the kid’s terrifying intellect.

Some of the best moments on the show explore their dynamic, and touch on the fact that, while neither are perfect or fully understand each other, they’re both capable of incredible emotional honesty:

In sum, don’t be like the boy: be like Marge Simpson.

Although honestly? She’ll probably like you just the way you are.

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Chris Woods is a Melbourne-based freelance journalist.