You Can Now Buy Tony Abbott Condoms: The Biggest Boner-Kill Of All

Kudos to the enterprising young chap who emailed us this afternoon, to make us aware of Budgie Smugglers: “Condoms For Your Primed Minister”.

The product hit the market yesterday, and the press release is just as good as the slogan. “After realising the gravity of Australia’s sexual health problem,” it reads, “three concerned youths embarked on a journey to ensure that every ceremonial mace is protected when entering the lower house. By thrusting our Supreme Leader to the tip of the safe sex movement they hope to bring awareness to the cause.”

And another quote: “Keep your pepperoni wrapped in a Tony.”

 

There are only 999 boxes of the limited edition condoms (“The best birth control since Abbott’s ears”), which each contain six prophylactics (that “won’t break like his promises”) at the sizeable set-back of $25 a pack.

But who can put a price on a good pun.

Just in time for Christmas.

Buy them here.