While You Were Sleeping, We Found You A Pope

New Pope!

Early this morning and after only  five votes, the 115 old guys who’d been locked up in the Vatican emerged with their new leader. Meet Argentinian cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio, aka Pope Francis: an old white Catholic man who thinks that gay adoption is a form of child abuse.

Bergoglioglo is 76 years old, only has one lung, and is the first non-European pope in 1200 years – and the first ever pope from the Americas. His selection was a bit of a shock: the frontrunners, according to the Irish bookmakers at Paddy Power, had been  Italy’s Archbishop Scola (11-4), Brazil’s Cardinal Odio Scherer (7-2), and Ghana’s Cardinal Peter Turkson (11-2). But while the odds were against him (33-1, according to Oddschecker), Bergoogle didn’t come out of nowhere; he was the runner-up to Pope Benedict last time, and he’s probably been harbouring resentment ever since.

Shortly after announcing the new pope, the Vatican reactivated his Twitter account and he cast his first spell:

 

New Mad Men promo shots:

Another day, another morsel of information about season six of Mad Men, which premieres with a two-hour special on April 7. Here are some new promo shots that were just released, in keeping with the season’s “affair of the year” theme. They’re really shiny and pretty and everyone looks great. New hairstyles! New beards!

Taylor Swift’s new music video was shot through an Instagram filter

The new clip for Swift’s song ’22’ features, apparently, all of her REAL LIFE FRIENDS! Hipster jokes never go over quite as smoothly as they should on the internet, so this will probably frustrate more than half of you.

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Veronica Mars: The Movie!

Creator/showrunner Rob Thomas launched a Kickstarter campaign to fund a movie of your favourite TV show, Veronica Mars. Yes, people, this is happening. The film will be locked into production once it gets $2 million, and they’ll start shooting pretty much right away. By early afternoon on the first day the campaign was up, it had raised its first million; it’s now at $1.3mil. [11.58am Update: They made it!!]

For a pledge of $10, you’ll receive a PDF of the shooting script on the day the movie comes out. For $35 you’ll get the script, a digital version of the movie within a few days of its release, and a limited edition T-shirt. For $350, a cast member of your choice (excluding Kristen Bell) will record your voicemail. For $10 000 you get invited to the premiere and the after party, a speaking role, and a framed copy of your line: “Your check, sir.” (Spoiler!) “Just say the line,” they advise. “Don’t over-think it. You’re a waiter. Your motivation is to turn over the table.”

Veronica Mars needs your help, the internet! But watch this promo video first: