This post discusses sexual assault, violence and trauma.

–

In October last year, Kim Kardashian was robbed at gunpoint by a small group of professional criminals in Paris. In pop culture/internet years this seems like eons ago, but it’s only now that we’re seeing the aftermath of that incident played out on Keeping Up With The Kardashians, an event that has had notable ramifications on how the family conducts themselves publicly and privately.

Even if you’re not a regular watcher of KUWTK, the promos for the 13th season exhibited a very deliberate tonal shift from previous seasons, with dramatic scenes playing out to the crescendo of Kanye West’s ‘FML’.

“I’ve been living without limits,” West sings as we watch shots of the Kardashian sisters smiling in very glamorous scenarios — until Paris happens, that is.

The last two episodes of KUWTK have been shocking and incredibly depressing viewing (did I expect to cry several times during these episodes? I did not!) documenting the weeks immediately following the robbery in a staggeringly transparent fashion (the timeline for scene reenactments in the show is usually much more skewed).

As Kim herself explained on Twitter before last week’s ‘Paris’ episode aired, the family wished to fill in the blanks of what was left unsaid during Kim’s three-month social media hiatus.

Tonight's episode is going to be very tough for me.

— Kim Kardashian West (@KimKardashian) March 19, 2017

However, I thought it was important to share this story through my eyes & not in an interview where my own words could be twisted.

— Kim Kardashian West (@KimKardashian) March 19, 2017

I have always shared so much & I'm not going to hold back when this was probably one of the most life changing experiences for me.

— Kim Kardashian West (@KimKardashian) March 19, 2017

I took a tragic horrific experience and did not let it diminish me, rather grew and evolved and allowed the experience to teach me.

— Kim Kardashian West (@KimKardashian) March 20, 2017

This meant we saw the Kardashians react to the same things that we did; like media commentators saying that Kim had faked the robbery for attention and Khloé appearing on The Ellen Show to explain what happened for the first time. Interestingly, KUWTK didn’t just dedicate one episode to the incident and then move on. The show seems determined to depict how this robbery has shaken the family irreparably and intentionally or not, how much Kim and Kris in particular have internalised blame for the incident.

‘Paris’ – Episode Two, Season 13

Even though we all know what happened now, it’s incredible how much dread you feel watching the first episode to deal with the robbery. The episode uses black title cards to explain that the first footage we see is of Kim and her family returning to New York from Paris the day after the incident.

Kim and Kanye, in the elevator up to see their children, both agree that they won’t discuss the robbery in front of North and Saint. “I think it’ll scare them if they start seeing more security,” Kim says.

The episode then jumps back to a week ago, to Kim and Kourtney in Paris for Fashion Week. They spend the first half of the episode trying to figure out their outfits, hanging out with their designer mates and applauding their little sister Kendall as she walks the runway. That night Kourtney leaves she and Kim’s apartment to meet Kendall at a club. The last we see of Kim before the robbery is her sitting in the apartment on her laptop.

There isn’t any other footage of the night of the robbery — many on the internet, especially Kardashian Kritics, wondered how much they’d actually show. That night back in America, Kanye leaves the stage halfway through a concert citing a “family emergency” to boos from the crowd.

This footage is provided by Kanye’s own team, who document most of what he does (that’s how he got that infamous Taylor Swift footage last year) which is probably why he seems so relaxed before he hears about Kim, smiling and joking with his team.

The actual robbery is explained in pieces to camera by Kourtney, Kendall and Kris. Basically, immediately afterward being robbed, Kim called Kourtney on an acquaintance’s phone screaming for help. Kourtney sent their bodyguard to the hotel, which was only ten minutes away. The sisters got there at the same time as the police and found Kim in the corner crying.

“We were all so traumatised that we left Paris even before the sun came up,” Kris explains. Kris says that it has been “emotionally scarring” for them all to think that Kim could have died. She then starts crying and tells the cameras “that’s enough now”.

The episode cuts back to the apartment in New York, with paparazzi calling out to Kim as she walks in. Kim plays with North while Kris cries in the corner.

In New York, they sit down to breakfast and Kanye’s manager asks Kim what happened. Kanye says that the men were professional criminals (“They were 40-50,” Kim chimes in). “They were sent there for sure, but they also know that if anything had happened to you, I wouldn’t have stopped until they were dead,” says Kanye. “This bullshit will never happen again,” says Kris as she prepares to leave. “Never,” replies Kanye, before hugging her.

On the plane back to L.A., Kim is swaddled in sweats, discussing the need for added security with Kris and Kris’ boyfriend Corey. Kim has already started seeing articles online that accuse her of making the robbery up. “Howard Stern said I should go to jail if this is fake?” she says, incredulous.

Corey explains that whatever happens, people will always have a negative reaction to the family, and that she has to accept it as the price of fame. “This family’s gonna have to deal with that forever,” he says.

When the family discuss the robbery when Kim isn’t around, they all look extremely uncomfortable and shocked that this could happen. Little details like Kris bringing a blanket to the crime scene to wrap Kim up in, and Kendall struggling to think of her big sister in such a vulnerable position, are pretty upsetting.

The crux of the episode is Kim seeing Khloé for the first time since Paris. She frankly talks about her experience with Khloé and Kourtney — including details which she had not shared with the press. Kim has now ascertained that the family were being watched the whole time they were in Paris, and that that night the thieves had figured out that Kim was alone and without security via social media.

While lying on top of her bed, Kim heard them come up the stairs loudly and then saw through a crack in her bedroom door that they had entered the apartment and tied up the concierge. They came into her room, grabbed her phone and dragged her out to the hallway. For the first time while telling the story, Kim’s voice cracks when recounting begging with the concierge to translate for her. “Please tell them I have babies,” she says.

Now for the very disturbing details: the robbers taped up Kim’s mouth, dragged her by the legs to another room (she was “basically naked” she tells her sisters) and held a gun to her head. She was certain that she would be sexually assaulted and murdered, fearing that Kourtney would have to be the one who discovered her body. The criminals instead left, and she was hiding in a bush on the balcony when her security guard found her.

At the end of this episode, the three sisters hug. Footage of Kim’s kids are repeatedly flashed on screen, which made me kind of sad — like the show needed to remind you why you should care about Kim’s trauma. “She’s a mother, see?”

What’s even worse is that some people probably did need to be reminded of her humanity, as if motherhood was the only lens through which she could attract sympathy.

‘Aftermath’ – Episode Three, Season 13

To be honest, I was surprised that the show continued to explore the consequences of the Paris robbery, besides the obligatory ‘This Happened’ episode — but of course, even that episode wasn’t obligatory.

The Kardashians have always been careful about what they share and what they don’t — a balance of curated promotion and transparency that makes them fascinating public figures. Their insistence on sharing this moment, one in which Lots of Things Were Going Wrong and they aren’t always shown in the most flattering light, adds another layer of intrigue.

The Kardashians’ biggest commodity is their ability to be both vulnerable and yet totally in control of their narrative. It shouldn’t be surprising that they’re being transparent, but it is surprising in this case how far they’re willing to go in depicting the family’s trauma.

Most of last night’s episode was concerned with the fact that once the shock of Paris had worn off, Kim was not really fine. She is often shown lounging around in (very fancy) tracksuits, surrounded by her siblings and their children. Kris talks about security compulsively, pointing out the security flaws of Kourtney’s home during lunch. Kim advises Blac Chyna and Rob to stop the “flashiness” on social media, as if the Kardashians were the architects of their own misfortune.

Although Khloé has stared doing press on behalf of the family (“We all have responsibilities and have to do our jobs”) Kim is still not on social media and many press obligations for the rest of the family have been cancelled. Being visible is still their literal job, so off Khloé goes to The Ellen Show.

The strangest (and saddest) moments of the episode was seeing Kim respond to the media storm following her robbery — in previous seasons, the sisters are often shown discovering things about each other on TMZ or The Daily Mail. During a family dinner, Kim shows the table the Halloween costume of her bound and gagged. The family are shocked and disgusted. Kim does not seem shocked, but tired.

“It really is hard when people sometimes don’t treat you like you’re human, and you’re going through such a real, raw experience that’s really traumatising,” she says. “I even saw a comment of someone saying they wished I had died that night… It just really sucks when you’re getting judged by the whole world.”

Kim doesn’t want to go to Paris to testify, and discusses with her publicist why some corners of the internet think the robbery was an “inside job” by the family. She talks with Kourtney about how a video illegally filmed at the crime scene was sold for $50,000. She repeatedly rejects Kris’ suggestions to see a therapist and looks incredibly exhausted.

The most unusual scene shows Khloé arriving at Kim’s house one night, while she is sobbing hysterically. We don’t see Kim, only hear her crying while she explains to Khloé that she was reminded of the robbery. Khloé says that while the family does seem to move on from things quickly, this is a hurt that will not be forgotten in a hurry. It’s almost like the audience is being reminded that this is not just a plot point to be discarded.

“We have to remind ourselves that this is trauma and make sure that we’re all catering to you and help you through something,” she says. “It doesn’t matter if people think it’s fake.” Kim continues to sob and we hear Khloé say to the producers: “We need to stop. I just don’t want anything on camera right now?”

The next day, Kim explains that the “Paris jitters” continue to upset her. Kanye came home late from his concert and startled her, hence why she was so upset. She was also triggered by items in her bathroom that she recalled staring at when she was lying on the bathroom floor in Paris. Kim tells Kris that she will go to therapy after all because “I want to be responsible for my children and husband”.

Kris, the matriarch who rules the Kardashian empire with an iron (manicured) fist, appears genuinely alarmed by the loss of control signalled by the Paris robbery. Kris says that the incident has reminded her of the murder of her friend Nicole Brown Simpson (her former husband famously defended O.J. Simpson in court). In previous interviews, Kris has spoken about how she feels as if she could have prevented Nicole’s death. “I could have lost three of my kids in one flash,” she says.

In the episode, Kris spends a lot of time fighting with Corey about the Kardashians’ security, with Corey having already volunteered to coordinate a greater level of protection for all the children. As the episode unravels, Corey deciphers that Kris’ micro-managing is really rooted in guilt.

“Life and death is not a job. It’s not a business deal,” he says. Kris says that “I can never forgive myself for what happened in Paris”.

Last night’s episode ended with a surprise party for Kim — a rare birthday that wasn’t recorded on social media. Kim is grateful that the party is at her house, where she “is comfortable and has lots of security”. She says that the best birthday gift she could receive was security. It’s a bittersweet scene.

When you see Kim react to the horrendous things posted on the internet almost immediately after she was assaulted, it’s no wonder that she wanted to tell this story on her own terms. Those who cynically crow that the robbery was perfect content (kontent?) for the show, haven’t been paying attention. This genuine upheaval — a real thing that happened to a real person and caused Kim to withdraw from the business that made her (and her family) a success. It’s hard to imagine it was all some nefarious plan, when it probably hurt her brand more than it elevated it.

In the end, it doesn’t really matter what the media makes of these Paris episodes. Kim, once again, has exhibited her greatest power: her ability to mould her own narrative, deliver this directly to fans and to piss off those who dismiss her as trivial.

Squad pic.twitter.com/zaYjdLPqbQ

— Kim Kardashian West (@KimKardashian) March 22, 2017

–

Keeping Up With The Kardashians is on Hayu and Foxtel’s E! channel.

–

You can reach Lifeline 24 hours a day on 13 11 14.