Ghosts Are Sending Selfies To Their Descendants Now
After centuries of ol' timey Victorian garb and mansion-haunting, ghosts have finally embraced modern technology.
Ghosts are notorious for not keeping up with the times. Despite millions-upon-millions of deaths since the start of the 20th century, they all still insist upon wearing Victorian garb and haunting old barns and mansions like it’s 1899, talking about chimney sweeps and cholera.
But that’s all apparently changed, as a Romanian woman claims the ghost of her dead grandmother inhabited her cell phone and used this astonishing ability to send her a blurry selfie.
Selfie from the spirit world, or the cover of the greatest shoegaze record never released?
“When I switched the phone on I was horrified to see my dead grandmother’s face”, Gina Mihai said, in what would later prove to be the sensible portion of her statement. “She had what looked like a snake around her neck, and the whole image looked as if it had been taken through a hole, like it was shot through a tear in the fabric that separates the living from the dead.”
Smart phones are complicated contraptions, open to any number of possible hardware or software faults. On top of this, they are also highly vulnerable to security breaches, further expanding the range of possibilities for this weird image. So obviously Miha didn’t leap to this otherworldly explanation without consultation.
“I took it to a fortune teller who told me that my grandmother was sending me a message from the other side. The snake around her neck was a symbol of the fact that she was being punished in the other life for some sin”, she confirmed. “By contacting us, she was telling us that if we were to pray for her, we would still be able to save her soul.”
Seems a complicated system for redemption in the afterlife. Also, props to a frail old ghost for being able to tear through that stubborn fabric that insists upon separating the living from the dead.
Is this the start of a new movement? Will 2014 see the world’s first ghost Vine? How come when slave ghosts reappear, their chains do too? Only time, and the good fortune tellers of this mysterious world, will tell.