Culture

This Extremely Mediocre Skier Somehow Made The Olympics, Is A True Inspiration To Us All

"She’s so utterly normal at it; just so *unremarkable.*"

by Tom Clift  21 February 2018
Elizabeth Swaney

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Never let a grinding lack of talent hold you back from doing what you love. That’s the moral of Elizabeth Swaney’s story. Swaney somehow made the Hungarian Olympic skiing team despite being, and we mean this in the nicest way possible, not very good.

Swaney baffled the world during the women’s ski halfpipe qualifiers in Pyeongchang, after turning in one of the most underwhelming performances you will ever see during an Olympic broadcast.  I’m not trying to be mean, but honestly the nicest thing that can be said about her run is that she didn’t fall flat on her face.

It turns out that Swaney, who is an American but has Hungarian grandparents, was only allowed to compete because of a fairly ridiculous loophole. For the past few years she has regularly registered top 30 finishes in World Cup events by virtue of the fact that there were less than 30 competitors. Attend enough events and don’t fall over, and apparently you’re in.

Swaney previously represented Venezuela in the skeleton. It’s unclear if she’s any better at that.

Despite finishing dead last, Swaney told Reuters it was “an honour to compete at the Olympics”, and that she was “really excited to compete among other amazing women from across the world”.

“I hope this can be a platform to inspire others,” she added, and the internet backs her 100% on that.

Elizabeth Swaney, we salute you.