It’s no secret that Aussies are obsessed with coffee. It’s also well known that every uni student who’s successfully reached graduation has relied on caffeine at some point.

Coffee is delicious, but there are downsides. If you’re trying to recalibrate after a late-night caffeine-fuelled exam period, are looking to sleep better or just can’t afford lattes anymore, it might be time to boot the bean.

Here are some ways to quit caffeine (that actually work):

Cold Turkey

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The Cold Turkey method – AKA the productivity kamikaze – is the quickest way to quit caffeine. All it consists of is abruptly giving up coffee and every product with caffeine in it. Easy right? This method is for the masochistic. You can pretty much expect to write off a week if you go Cold Turkey, which makes the last days of mid-sem break the perfect time to get it done.

Day 1one may be easy, but don’t be fooled, your body just hasn’t shaken off the previous day’s caffeine. Day two will be the worst, so make sure that you have a show you’ve been meaning to binge-watch because you’ll need it. By day three, you’ll be ready to interact with other people again, but that’s when you’ll realise just how much your social life relied on coffee.

You can either become a hermit or face the fact that now you’re the sort of person who invites people to catch up over a juice. The week will get progressively better, and before too long, you’ll be on your way to #wellness.

Cutting Down

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If a week out of action doesn’t sound appealing to you, you can simply cut down. This is probably the most popular quitting method.

Time for a bit of math. You’re not actually addicted to a certain number of cups a day, but to the caffeine contained in the drink. So, taking Australian standards into account, if you’re drinking a large cappuccino in the morning and a regular latte in the afternoon, you’re not on two cups-a-day, but on three shots of espresso.

So cutting down could be as simple as going from three shots on Monday, to two on Tuesday, one on Wednesday and none on Thursday. If that’s too hard, a popular option is going down a shot every two days.

Cutting down is an effective and easier way than quitting Cold Turkey, but beware, it requires very strong willpower. 

Substitution 

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The last, most destructive way to quit coffee is substitution. It involves temporarily replacing your coffee addiction with other habits to keep your mind occupied.

This could be as wholesome as indulging in every type of Twinings tea, or becoming a compulsive gum chewer. For those who watched a bit too much Skins in high school, it becomes more nefarious.

I don’t endorse drinking or smashing darts to handle coffee withdrawals, but I’m not going to say it doesn’t work. The key is to make sure your temporary addictions don’t become more permanent once you’ve quit coffee. If you don’t think you can pull that off, then substitution is definitely not for you.

Moderate Consumption Like a Normal Person

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If none of these methods do it for you, fear not, there’s one alternative that trumps all of these: consuming moderate amounts like a normal person. Coffee tastes great, increases productivity and even makes you live longer. So if you don’t want to quit coffee, don’t! But try to consume normal levels of the stuff.