There are many reasons why high school friendships can be temporary, but essentially, they all boil down to one thing: change. You’ll no longer be surrounded by your friends 7 hours a day, 5 days a week. Now, you’ll be required to put in the effort to maintain your friendships, and you might learn the hard way that some of them were just circumstantial.

Your hobbies and interests will change. Some friendships are based on common interests, like your mutual hatred of your maths teacher. Once these are no longer relevant, you just drift apart.

But most importantly, you will change. You’ll take charge of your own journey, gain independence, and begin to carve out your niche in this mad, scary world. This can be the hardest step, because moving forward often means watching your friends, and the cherished memories you made together, disappear in your rear view mirror.

But there are also those rare and beautiful friendships that weather the storm that is life after high school. It may even be those people who you least expect to stick around that end up being your closest friends a couple of years on. Maybe you weren’t so close to them in school; you might have done different subjects, or hung around with different friendship groups. But when these dramatic post-school changes take place, and the pressures of high school cliques and drama has been lifted, you might find that someone completely unexpected could emerge as your best friend and greatest ally.

Friendships, like life, are largely unpredictable. Luckily, there are a few signs you can look for in your late high school and early uni days that indicate a long-lasting friendship.

You Don’t Rely On Gossip

Chances are, by the time you reach university you’ll have already headed in a vastly different direction to many of your friends. They’ll be in different faculties, different unis, maybe even different countries. A lack of common ground means a lack of juicy goss that both of you can relate to, so if your conversations with a friend revolve primarily around bonding over the latest school rumours, it seems unlikely that the friendship will extend much past high school.

Your Friendship Is A Judgement-Free Zone

While high school can often be a place full of judgement (refer to any teen movie ever), your friendship certainly isn’t. While university may not always bring out the best in you, a lasting friend won’t think poorly of you – no matter how many midnight breakdowns or bad decisions you might go through.

You Can Empathise With Each Other

When you’re in vastly different study/life scenarios, this friend will listen to your problems and do their best to empathise, even if they don’t entirely understand where you’re coming from. While #medproblems and #artsproblems are definitely not in the same ballpark, you and this friend do your best to listen to and support each other, no matter what.

Although losing a friend is a tough time for all parties involved, the key to moving on is accepting the temporary nature of friendships, and knowing that sometimes it’s OK to just let go.

Stacey is a University of Queensland Journalism and Arts student. She is well-versed in existential crises, Netflix binges and the literary works of J.K. Rowling.

(Lead image: Gilmore Girls/Warner Bros)