Culture

This Hilariously Brutal Takedown Of The Royal Family By The Irish Times Is Required Reading

Any article that calls Prince Andrews a “sweatless creep” is worth reading.

by Patrick Lenton  10 March 2021
Irish Times Meghan Harry

Want more Junkee in your life? Sign up to our newsletter, and follow us on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook so you always know where to find us.

With the British monarchy currently under the spotlight due to the massively publicised shenanigans of Meghan and Harry’s tell-all interview on Oprah, we absolutely must stop and listen to what the Irish think of it all.

The Irish, famously, have some thoughts on the British royals. And this column in the Irish Times by writer Patrick Freyne has quickly established itself as the definitive Irish response, because it is both hilarious and brutal.

Seriously, I mean read this lede to begin with:

“Having a monarchy next door is a little like having a neighbour who’s really into clowns and has daubed their house with clown murals, displays clown dolls in each window and has an insatiable desire to hear about and discuss clown-related news stories. More specifically, for the Irish, it’s like having a neighbour who’s really into clowns and, also, your grandfather was murdered by a clown.”

I mean, sets the tone.

Another highlight is when the writer calls Prince Andrew a “sweatless creep“, which I think might be the canonical description of the man, which will linger on long beyond his freakishly dry body being interred in the royal crypt.

But Freyne also touches on why this story moves beyond mere royal gossip, and why the plight of Meghan and Harry have resonated even to avowed royal haters.

“The reason this isn’t a mere royal nonstory is because it’s ultimately about race and gender and touches on a number of very real contemporary anxieties around fairness, equality and institutional bigotry.”

Anyway, I won’t spoil the rest of it: read the article here.