While You Were Sleeping, Lena Dunham And Shia LaBeouf Had 2014’s First Celebrity Twitter Feud
It's all uphill from here. Also, Morrissey said some Morrissey things, David Lynch needs some "hot caucasians" for a new Twin Peaks shoot, and more.
Shia LaBeouf and Lena Dunham had a vicious Twitter feud
And by “vicious”, we mean “pretty lame”. It all started when reluctant tweeter Dunham subtly insulted Shia’s recent skywritten non-apology to comics author Daniel Clowes.
Shia caught wind of the diss, and responded in the most Shia way possible: he plagiarised one of Lena Dunham’s own old apologies (and then blamed the whole thing on lean).
And then Lena cleverly diffused the entire situation with a nice joke about Shia’s early 2000s Disney sitcom, Even Stevens.
And thus ends the first celebrity Twitter feud of 2014; it’s all uphill from here.
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David Lynch is apparently shooting some new Twin Peaks footage later this week
And it’s potentially great employment news for you “HOT Caucasian girls”, as a recent Facebook casting call explained.
TWIN PEAKS PROMO. Directed by David Lynch. Shoots in Los Angeles on Tuesday, January 7, 2014. Prob a 6 hour or less day. Rate is 150/8. You must live in LA to submit. I don’t think SAG has jurisdiction on this, so SAG and NON can submit. I have called SAG to double check this and I am awaiting a call back to confirm this though.
HOT Caucasian girl – BRUNETTE OR REDHEADS ONLY to play waitress. Age 18-27. MUST have an amazing body. Busty, very period looking face. Please submit two current color photos (one body shot, one face shot), your sizes, union status and contact info to: [email protected]. Subject line should read: TP Promo
But don’t get too excited, you Audrey Horne wannabes. The shoot’s reportedly just for a promo for the upcoming Blu-Ray release of the show, which is expected around March this year.
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Morrissey compares meat-eating to paedophilia, also announces new novel
As Morrissey fans would be aware, probably the second-least exciting moment of his live show (after that inevitable moment when he removes his shirt and shows us some middle-aged gut) is the bit when he introduces ‘Meat Is Murder‘ and makes you feel like a total arsehole for having eaten two burgers, like, 15 minutes before the gig started. Well, in a candid new interview with the fan site True To You, Moz recaptured that spirit with a few choice quotes.
The bit about meat-eating being paedophilia: “If you have access to You Tube, you should click on to what is called The video the meat industry doesn’t want you to see. If this doesn’t affect you in a moral sense then you’re probably granite. I see no difference between eating animals and paedophilia. They are both rape, violence, murder. If I’m introduced to anyone who eats beings, I walk away. Imagine, for example, if you were in a nightclub and someone said to you, ‘Hello, I enjoy bloodshed, throat-slitting and the destruction of life,’ well, I doubt if you’d want to exchange phone numbers.”
The bit where he tells Jamie Oliver to cook his own children: “If Jamie ‘Orrible is so certain that flesh-food is tasty then why doesn’t he stick one of his children in a microwave? It would taste the same as cooked lamb.”
The bit where he compares abattoirs to Auschwitz: “If you believe in the abattoir then you would support Auschwitz. There’s no difference. People who would disagree with this statement have probably never been inside an abattoir.”
And then, after all that, he announced that he’s writing a novel: “In 2013, I published my Autobiography and it has been more successful than any record I have ever released, so, yes, I am mid-way through my novel. I have my hopes.”
Read the full interview here, where there are other great quotes about the Queen, Obama, an upcoming album, and his love of “classically designed trousers”.
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Sherlock is back, and spoiling everything
The BBC’s weirdly popular Sherlock, starring internet hero Benedict Cumberbatch, returned to TV screens last week for its third season, bringing [TOTALLY OBVIOUS SPOILER ALERT] its hero back from the grave. Obviously, he didn’t miss anything while he was away [SPOILER ALERTS FOR EVERY OTHER SHOW EVER].
Gah, we all have a friend like Sherlock, what a dick.