It’s hard being single. That big bed all to yourself, no one using up the hot water, not having to make small talk with in laws? THE WORST.

Joking aside, if you’re single, it’s almost assumed you should be on some sort of dating app. In fact if you’re not, and you’re unhappily single, your friends will probably tell you you’re not trying to find a relationship. Which is frankly an unfair thing to say and you should stop being friends with them ASAP.

Some people swear by these dating apps and find the love of their life on there. But if online dating isn’t your thing, it’s totally fine not to have an account. If people ask you why you’re not, link them this.

We’ve Never Needed Them Before

Your grandparents didn’t need technology to find each other. Unless they met through the newspaper classifieds or something like that, neither did your parents. All the ways people used to find people still exist. Most people still find their partner through work, friends, or school. So unless you’re a distance student who studies from home, all these options are still there.

Meeting someone in the real world also cuts out a lot of the problems you wouldn’t necessarily notice online. Almost anyone can be charming through messages, not so much when they don’t have time to fine tune their response. You’ll learn this through dating apps eventually, but it could mean two months of your life spent chatting to a dud person who’s rude to waiters – you can’t get that time back.

“How Did You Guys Meet?”

No one wants to tell people they met online. While there’s not as much stigma around it anymore, there’s just no story. Would you rather tell people you met online, or you met at a bar when you were both vomiting in the gutter? Only one of these is #couplegoals.

People watch romcoms for meet cutes, not people staring at their phones.

Keyboard Warriors Exist

Bumble is better than Tinder in this regard, but neither are that great. People say things on dating apps that they (probably/hopefully) wouldn’t say to your face. If someone came up to me on the street and said half of the things people send on Tinder as their first message, I would be terrified.

People suck in the real world, but they are literally the worst on the internet.

They’re Straight-Up Unfair

I don’t know about you, but I would like to think I’m better looking in person (or at least that’s what I tell myself while untagging terribly unflattering photos). Photos aren’t real: photoshop exists, as do camera angles, lenses, and pixel quality. So does a strategic pose.

Looks aren’t all that matters but people swipe on tinder often based on looks alone. Hell, Tinder is treated like a game, and they know it – Tinder’s ‘It’s A Match!’ used to give you the option to “Send Message”, or “Keep Playing”. We all want people to find us attractive, but that isn’t the end of it. To quote Judge Judy, “Beauty Fades. Dumb is Forever.”

Stick to the real world, guys.

Maddie Worledge is a Hobart-based writer with an affinity for sleeping. When awake, she can be found on most social media sites at @maddieworledge, looking at cat videos and recipes she’ll never actually cook.

(Lead image: Younger/TV Land)