Obviously this article is packed full of spoilers for To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before, the greatest rom-com in the world, as well as theories and half-baked ideas and plots and schemes and dreams. There’s a lot in here. But primarily, we’re gonna talk about which goddamn snake leaked the hot-tub video.

The hot tub scene serves the dual purpose of being excessively hot — like honestly, so hot I’m not sure I’m allowed to watch it. So hot that I have to remember that jacuzzis are absolutely teeming with bacteria and infectious diseases, and are basically slow boiling soups of STIs.

But it’s also the catalyst for the film’s biggest complication — the infamous posting of the hot tub video.

It’s prime high school drama: a ruiner of reputation for Lara Jean, and a chance for Peter Kavinsky to stand up and defend her honour. As we know, the problem is resolved summarily and sweetly, but in the rush towards reconciliation we never actually get a confirmation on which absolute beehive tried to ruin this perfect and pure relationship.

But we have some theories. And they are, frankly, shocking.

Still thinking about that hot tub leg manoeuvre from To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before pic.twitter.com/3DuBRIEFfi

— Naomi (@minimfeatures) August 20, 2018

Gen

We’re meant to assume it’s apex Mean Girl Gen, as she has both the motive and opportunity. It seems a no-brainer. She’s mean! And conniving!

But, it also doesn’t quite make sense — Gen’s whole schtick is possession of Peter, with a kind of “rightful claim” grudge against Lara Jean. To have the entire school see him being so passionately and presently sexy with Lara Jean in the hot tub would be humiliating for her. And she’s all about pride. She’s also technically meant to be up in her room waiting for him to come visit her, so she’s got no alibi.

It’s just too obvious. It wasn’t Gen.

Settle a bet for me and @terplinz: What’s the more unrealistic thing about To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before? The hot tub all to themselves with no chaperones or the existence of a Korean store in Charlottesville?

— Alena Davis (@alenamdavis) August 26, 2018

Lucas

Not much is known about Lucas. He is one of the titular boys whomst Lara Jean loved, and he is gay. After mostly ignoring Lara Jean, he suddenly cosies up to her on the ski-trip — perhaps to be a cool friend? Or perhaps because he is a snake. He’s the one who knew Peter was waiting for her in the hot tub. He could have told her in order to lay the trap.

Why? Maybe just to be messy. Maybe because he hates Lara Jean. Maybe because he loves Peter. And maybe because he is friends with Gen.

Chris

Lara Jean’s quirky best friend doesn’t actually seem to be a great friend. She doesn’t even have LUNCH with Lara Jean, instead opting for badly made sandwiches. Her only motivation to do things seems to be to annoy her cousin Gen, who she hates. Perhaps her entire friendship with Lara Jean is just so she can get back at Gen?

When you think about it that way, it makes sense that she’d completely sell out both Lara Jean and Peter Kavinsky in order to upset Gen — while we focus on the fact that Lara Jean is hurt by the hot tub video stunt, it’s easy to forget that it also hurts Gen. Chris is a snake.

made my parents watch to all the boys i’ve loved before and my dad’s only comments during the hot tub scene were “they aren’t skiing! sarah did she not ski in the book? no? what a waste”

— sarah (@xyzoah) August 27, 2018

Margot

Look, Margot is clearly Mona from Pretty Little Liars, and using a sneaky film to ruin people is absolutely her game. I don’t know what her whole goal is, but tbh, Pretty Little Liars is a weird hat-shaped blur that I can barely manage, so I guess maybe… Lara Jean is A? I dunno.

Finally saw to all the boys I’ve loved before with @svnnykim, so uh why didn’t they just fuck in the hot tub, I mean I would. 🤷🏽‍♂️

— Angelo (@angelodesu) August 26, 2018

Josh

I mean, I wouldn’t put anything past this fuckboy, except for the fact that he wasn’t on the ski trip, which probably rules him out.

OOF. Can’t rule that out as a possibility. Him saying “you’re like… the sweet, innocent girl” during their argument felt… oh, god. I think Josh did it. https://t.co/fXdNFmgXof

— Saeed Jones (@theferocity) August 27, 2018

Kitty

Here’s the thing — we only have hypothesis and conjecture for every single one of these suspects, with varying levels of plausibility. We just can’t be sure it would be any of them. We can only guess.

But, there’s one character we KNOW has pulled stunts like this before — Kitty, the youngest sister. The entire premise of the film revolves around her completely fucked sabotage of Lara Jean. We know she’s sneaky, we know she loves to cause trouble, and frankly I don’t believe her whole “I had Lara Jean’s best interests at heart” story.

My theory is that she’s taking a leaf out of Lara Jean’s book and is coveting her older sister’s boyfriend, Peter Kavinsky. That’s her motive to ruin it all.

The only question is how did she get on the ski trip? Perhaps she stowed away on the bus?

Doesn’t matter, she’s a snake.

Of all the posts I’ve seen about “To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before”, nobody has addressed the fact that Laura Jean gets into the hot tub with her nightgown on then goes to bed in the same wet nightgown like it’s not a big deal.

— ⭐️SmallAsDust⭐️ (@miss_firedancer) August 26, 2018

You can watch To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before on Netflix. You obviously already have, but go do it again.