Teen Girls Are Finally Getting Their Thirsty Coming Of Age Films
We're in a golden-age of sex-positive films and TV shows for girls.
When it comes to girls and sex, rarely is it discussed in a positive, empowered way. So, here’s a newsflash, in case y’all didn’t know: girls are thirsty too!
“Teenage girls themselves are always under the microscope,” Dr. Athena Bellas says in her podcast Teen Screen Feminism, which charts the depiction of teen pregnancy in film right back to the silent era. This is especially true when it comes to sexuality.
Often only allowed to exist between the dichotomy of the Virgin (Sandy at the beginning of Grease) or the Whore (Sandy’s outfit at the end of Grease), female sexuality is either feared (all hail Megan Fox’s succubus in Jennifer’s Body (*fire emoji*), something that needs to be condemned (The double standard of slut-shaming Easy A works to call out) or used entirely for consumption by others (The Geek and a drunk Caroline in Sixteen Candles). Ugh, as if!
Teen sex comedies became all the rage in the 80s with films like Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Porky’s and Risky Business, and came back with a fervour in the 2000s with the American Pie series, EuroTrip, and Superbad.
Many of these films all centre on teenage boys and their horny antics in their pursuit of losing their virginities to any hot babe they set their eyes on.
They are funny, ridiculous and over the top (pie-screwing included), but by being male-focused the girls are pretty much either over-sexualised pinups for boy’s sexual gratification, or over-emotional prudes. It’s kind of sad to think that this is all we can get when it comes to female sexuality: always the sex object, never the sex agent.
The Netflix TV show Sex Education is glorious in the way it contributes to the shifting conversation in regard to sex positivity, sex education and female desire.
Right from the get-go, the show about a teen sex therapist encourages girls to figure out for themselves what turns them on, with a montage of the popular Aimee (Aimee Lou Wood) masturbating early in the series.
From lesbian sex to dirty talk to asexuality, Sex Education offers an expansive exploration into all the ways desire (or lack thereof) can manifest. The show honours the importance of open communication and posits that every girl is different. Sex and desire are not a “one size fits all” situation, and there is nothing to be ashamed about.
While we owe a lot to Sex Education, there has also been a number of movies and TV shows working towards changing the way girls and sex are represented on screen – less shame, more laughs and positivity. So, without further ado, meet my thirsty gals:
The To Do List (2013) Stan
“Ladies, we need to take charge of our own sexual gratification!”
When thinking about female-centred sex comedies, The To Do List is the first one to come to mind. Set in 1993 and fresh from graduation, Valedictorian Brandy Klark (Aubrey Plaza) realises she needs to up her sexual (in)experiences in preparation for college.
A studious planner, she does her research and writes a “To Do List” of all the sexual experiences to try throughout the summer, culminating in the goal of losing her virginity to resident Hot Guy, Rusty Waters (Scott Porter).
Essentially, as writer and director Maggie Carey describe it, “It’s a coming of age story about a teenage girl who wants to get laid.”
This movie has everything. Literally, the List has things on it you would hardly hear of outside of porn (I’m really selling this movie to the kids, hey?).
It also has a cast filled with favourites such as Alia Shawkat, as one of Brandy’s best friends; Bill Hader (my current thirst object of choice, don’t @ me) as Brandy’s burnout boss at the local pool; Connie Britton as her sex-positive mother; Rachel Bilson as Brandy’s wildly more sexually-experienced older sister; Andy Samberg as a douchebag musician; and Donald Glover as a fellow pool employee, who wants to get better at eating out (and I don’t mean going to get pizza).
As Brandy goes through her list with the same determination as studying for the SATs, The To Do List is as awkward and gross and sexual as any other male-led sex comedy. However, with a girl at the helm we get the added benefits of pointing out that most women never climax because men can’t find the g-spot (a travesty!).
What makes The To Do List so awesome though is Brandy’s realisation that sex is a big deal, but it’s also not a big deal. This is to say that sex doesn’t have to be something to be scared or feel ashamed of, which is a refreshing difference to what girls are commonly told via film and TV.
Concern is still out there (Euphoria’s relationship with sex, for example, is quite dark), but with films like The To Do List, there are now more choices towards opening the conversation.
Never Have I Ever (2020 – ) Netflix
“I think about sex 24/7 but I don’t know how to do it.”
When we first meet Devi Vishwakumr (Maitreyi Ramakrishnan), the 15-year old protagonist of Mindy Kaling’s new show Never Have I Ever, she is praying to the Gods for a “stone cold hottie, who could rock [her] all night long.”
Devi is determined to have the best Sophomore year ever and turn her life around, starting with a boyfriend and losing her virginity. With her eyes set on the dreamy Paxton Hall-Yoshida (Darren Barnet), Devi’s thirst is palpable as Robyn’s ‘Dancing On My Own’ plays each time he walks on screen.
Devi focusing on the loss of her virginity is something she controls. When her therapist (Niecy Nash) suggests she find something she can do this year to succeed at “that would actually make you happy and make you feel good about yourself,” Devi walks right up to Paxton after his swim practice and shoots her shot: she asks him if he would like to have sex together.
While this probably isn’t what Dr. Ryan had in mind when she offered this advice, for Devi, the expression of her desires are positive emotions she can focus on to distract her from her grief.
The year prior her father (Sendhil Ramamurthy) died after suffering a heart attack at one of her music recitals. The trauma of which leads her to temporary paralysis in her legs for three months. Although she is definitely avoiding having to deal with these emotions, the acceptance of her desire is never something Devi struggles with or feels worried about.
It’s a part of her.
Positive representation on screen is important as they help inform girls how to view ourselves and the world around us.
Writing on how Never Have I Ever challenges past depictions of South Asian women, Tara Joshi writes, “South Asian women in much western mainstream television are sexless sidekicks, fustily serious or simply the mothers and siblings of South Asian men.”
Never Have I Ever changes this, and with a character like Devi, writer Sangeeta Singh-Kurtz argues, “It’s a good thing that we can turn on Netflix and see a horny Indian girl who’s both a nerd and an asshole.”
Pen15 (2019 – ) Stan & Booksmart (2019)
“How gross can I feel if you do it, too?”
It’s time to talk some more about flicking the bean. Oh yes, female masturbation, baby!
Female masturbation is even more a taboo than female desire. It’s either not talked about at all or the instant reaction is “Ew, gross!” (This actually happens in The To Do List by Brandy’s friends). However, if we must sit through years and years of jokes about guys jerking off, we will celebrate female masturbation.
Starring comics and actual adults Maya Erskine and Anna Konkle as 13-year old versions of themselves in the year 2000, Pen15 is a cringe-comedy about the excruciatingly awkward years of middle school. In episode 3, ‘Ojichan,’ 13-year-old Maya (portrayed by Erskine) discovers masturbation and spends the episode a slave to these urges (much like Otis in the opening montage of season 2 of Sex Education).
This makes her distant from her best friend Anna (Konkle) as she makes up excuses, so she can go home and rub one out. After an incident with a Ouija board and the word “clit”, Maya opens up to Anna about what’s been going on.
Emotional and concerned she’s a pervert, she tells Anna “I’m like Sam [a classmate who made a joke about jerking off at school], only I’m grosser because I’m a girl.”
Thinking she shouldn’t be doing what she’s doing, Maya is comforted by Anna, who opens up saying she does it, too. When Maya asks, “you don’t feel gross?” Anna replies, “How gross can I feel if you do it, too?”
This is a very touching scene between friends, played out with deft understanding and fear by Erskine and Konkle. They may be 30-year-olds playing 13-year-olds, but the scene demonstrates how important it is to be open and encouraging about these issues. There is less to feel ashamed about when you know it’s a normal part of growing up, that your best friend does it, too.
In contrast, Booksmart talks about masturbation so casually.
There is no preface to the conversation other than Molly’s unhelpful advice about lesbian sex. The tone is more like yah, we all do it: Amy (Kaitlyn Dever) mounts a stuffed toy panda, Molly (Beanie Feldstein) once used an electric toothbrush to get off and gave herself a UTI (please do not try this at home).
The more we talk about it, hopefully the less girls will feel like they are grosser than a boy for doing it, because girl’s “shouldn’t masturbate” (which is BS when Jim literally gets his hand super glued to his dick in American Pie 2).
It’s no coincidence that all these movies and TV shows discussed above were written, directed and created by women. After years of comedies about horny boys, we’re taking hold of the conversation and saying we are thirsty too, and it can be awkward and hilarious but also normal and beautiful.
This is by no means an exhaustive list, and is also cis-women centered. There is still much that is unsaid and unexplored about the desires/bodies of trans women that isn’t negative. Also, except for Amy in Booksmart, the list is quite hetero-normative. Depictions of non-cishet-male desire on screen still have a long way to go, but it’s great to see the ways the conversation is changing, broadening the scope.
And because I feel like everyone’s older sister right now: stay safe, always take things at your own pace, only do what feels comfortable and with open consent, and stay thirsty, ladies.
This has been part of Junkee’s column TEEN SCREEN.
Claire White is a writer/bookseller based in Melbourne. She is a Teen Screen Tragic/Scholar, wrote a thesis about on-screen depictions of girlhood, and dyed her hair red to be like Molly Ringwald. Find her on Twitter @theclairencew.