We Are Never Ever Ever Getting Taylor Swift Tickets

I would not classify myself as a full-blown Swiftie. I’m not even sure what that means. Can you just be into the songs or do you have to resent Jake Gyllenhaal too?

Either way, I do love Taylor Swift’s music. And it looks like she puts on a fantastic live show. The outfits, the exclusive songs, the general spectacle of it all. It just feels like a big cultural moment, so it would be nice to be a part of it.

Well, apparently everyone else on the country feels this way because the ticket buying process for shows in Australia has been absolutely apocalyptic.

There was an American Express pre-sale on Monday. The site crashed.

There was a pre-sale today. It was way too confusing and the site might as well have crashed. 

(For hours now, I’ve had a browser tab open that promises me that my turn to purchase tickets is coming soon. Hopefully “soon” means sometime before February because at this rate I’m going to miss all the shows.)

This shouldn’t surprise anyone. Fans in the US ran into similar problems — Ticketmaster crashing, lawsuits against Ticketmaster, the Senate investigation into Ticketmaster… Ticketmaster at least certainly seems to be having a tough time.

I don’t blame Taylor Swift for any of this, of course. If anything, I’m a little disappointed in myself for liking something so popular. For me, the first sign that something is to be avoided is if a lot of people want to do it. Opening night for a movie? No way. Wait to get into a restaurant? There’s literally thousands of them all over the place no thanks. Stare at a screen for hours hoping to get through so I can pay hundreds and potentially thousands of dollars for the privilege to be packed into an enormous arena to see performances of songs that I can listen to for free on my own?

Well, I’m still staring at that screen, so I guess the answer’s yes.

And I’m not alone. I asked a few other Taylor Swift fans in the office to describe the dizzying highs and inevitable lows of attempting to purchase an Eras Tour ticket…

“It’s Not Over ‘Til It’s Over” 

My sister and I have been on a combined six devices and ten browsers since 6:30am. We both resurrected our old iPhones from the dead this morning and logged into the Ticketek app on those too. It’s seven hours later and we’re both at work, still looking at our multi-browser villain setup and honestly, we still have hope. Call me delusional, but I’m gonna get tickets. There’s been glimmers of success from pals in my group chats, so it’s possible. It’s not over ‘til it’s over, baby. Kinda need to pee, but I’m not moving unless you pry me from this wheelie chair.

I’ve made almost 100 friendship bracelets — like, the hand-beaded, hand-threaded kind. What am I gonna do with 100 friendship bracelets?

It’s a little disturbing to me that folks are walking around the office like there isn’t a cultural phenomenon and gross injustice occurring right in front of them. My poor fingers are freezing just hovering over the screen and the mouse (yes I’m on both devices) and colleagues are trying to chat? Absurd.

– Talecia Vescio, Social Video Producer

Working In Shifts, Slowly Losing Hope

Getting Taylor Swift tickets has become a team effort in our office. If you aren’t buying tickets, you are helping someone who is buying tickets. If you need to pee, you give another staff member your pre-sale code and card details and make a speedy dash to the loo while they sit at your desk. Another employee has become our official source of the truth, as she shares regular updates and memes from Twitter.

The six of us attempting to secure tickets have ventured into the third hour, and we are all slowly losing hope and questioning our life choices. I am trying to convince myself that seeing her live three times is enough, and that I can live without going to this tour, but as soon as another Taylor Swift song plays on the work speaker, I am reminded of why I am enduring this torture.

Long live TS.

I had the time of my life waiting in queue for you.

– Ellie Kamateros, Administration Manager

“I Will Need To Eat Lunch At Some Point”

I really wish that they would tell you where you were in the queue so you could kind of go about your day and not risk missing out. It’s annoying to have to pivot back and forth between your work and the “lounge” page.

Also, I will need to eat lunch at some point and possibly use the bathroom — what if that’s when I get in? It’s stressing me out just thinking about it.

Mainly, I feel bad for the diehard fans who will miss out on these tickets. I feel like there should be some sort of fan knowledge quiz to get early entry or some other way super fans could have a better chance for access. I’d love tickets, but if I don’t get them I won’t be heartbroken. I know that some fans, though, will be devastated.

– Rebel Haslingden, Senior Manager, Travel Products & Partnerships

“I Was Prepared To Fight To The Death”

I’m not a diehard Swiftie, but I was prepared to fight to the death to get tickets. That’s just the attitude you have to have when you’re engaged in this kind of battle. 

My friend messaged me this morning in a panic. She wasn’t able to sign into her Ticketek account. So I postponed a meeting to try my luck. I only signed in on one browser so Ticketek wouldn’t think I was a bot, my credit card details were up to date, and I simply waited. 

After staring at the loading screen for hours, I decided to crack on with my work while while occasionally re-copying the Frontier pre-sale code. Suddenly, the page refreshed and lingered on a white loading screen. This was it — I was FINALLY past the cursed “lounge”. I had seven minutes to make my selections and check out. 

But I couldn’t click anything. I tried not to panic and kept jamming my finger down on my mouse.

I got through to choose my tickets.

But there were none left!

Two minutes to go.

The Sunday show. E Reserve. There were two left!

I rushed through the checkout as fast as I could.

I fired off some messages to my friend and wanted to cry, thinking that I was about to lose the tickets at the last possible moment.

But I got through. I GOT THROUGH.

My friend and I cried and rejoiced and Taylor? We’ll see you next year. 

– Rachel Choy, Punkee Senior Entertainment Writer

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Nick Bhasin is Junkee’s Contributing Editor. His novel I Look Forward To Hearing From You is out now.