Politics

Scott Morrison Has Been Dubbed ‘Clot Morrison’ After His Horrific COVID Vaccine Rollout

ScoMo sure does have a clot to answer for.

Scott Morrison Clot Morrison vaccine

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Scott Morrison has long been criticised for his abysmal COVID-19 vaccine rollout plans.

Despite the prime minister setting a target of four million vaccinations by the end of March, less than one million doses of AstraZeneca have actually been administered so far. And even though Scott Morrison blamed “international supply issues” for the missed target, the European Union have denied the claims that they’ve blocked 3.1 million doses from getting to Australia.

Basically, it’s been a real shit show.

But yesterday that shit show somehow got even worse when ScoMo announced that his already painfully slow vaccine plan was going to change due to fears over AstraZeneca causing blood clots — an issue that effects women, especially those on the contraceptive pill, regularly.

The fears have come after a “probable” case of a rare blood clot disorder was observed in a 44-year-old Australian man who was given the AstraZeneca vaccine. Coronacast host Dr Norman Swan told the ABC that the hospitalised man’s low platelets and clots in his liver, spleen, and gut “fits the description of vaccine-induced pro-thrombotic thrombocytopenia”.

Despite promising to increase the number of GPs who can administer vaccines from 1,500 to 4,000 earlier in the week, the prime minister has now said that the AstraZeneca vaccine — the main vaccine that Australia currently has — should only be offered to people over 50 in his latest press conference.

While Scott Morrison says it’s not a ban on the vaccine or advice to not get vaccinated, he has suggested that those under 50 should instead take the Pfizer vaccine, which, again, is something Australians barely have access to despite it being the vaccine that Scott Morrison himself was administered.

Labor’s Anthony Albanese noted that organising vaccine deals with companies other than AstraZeneca could have easily prevented issues like this occurring but that Morrison’s “arrogance” has resulted in vaccination delays for Australians. For perspective, the prime minister shared that he recently “secured” around 20 million Pfizer doses for Australia for “by end of the year”.

Worse still, Morrison tried to calm fears over potential blood clots by adopting the logic that because the contraceptive pill causes regular blood clots, Australians should not stress over ones caused by the vaccine — as though women suffering through clots that are way more likely is fine, so long as men aren’t affected.

With vaccine-related blood clots only occurring in around one to five in every million immunisations, Scott Morrison noted that “the combined oral contraceptive pill can include adverse side effects of venous thromboembolism” and occurs in seven to 10 per 10,000 women, so therefore the jab is actually quite safe.

Again, it’s a giant shit show.

After so much flip-flopping, excuses, and mishandling of the vaccine rollout, people have decided they’re just fed up with Morrison’s poor form towards the vaccine rollout that he originally claimed Australia would be at “the front of the queue for”.

ScoMo’s strange plan (of basically no plan at all) in response to his own delayed vaccination rollout, and to reported blood clots that only seem to be an issue once men are affected is laughable. So laughable, that the internet has decided that ScoMo is finally deserving of a new name: Clot Morrison.

But in all seriousness — as funny as the concept of ‘Clot Morrison’ is — you know it’s bad once we genuinely start looking to the US to compare our mishandling of the pandemic.