‘Masked Singer Australia’ S1E7 Recap: Well, The Judges Have Completely Given Up

We’re down to the semi-finals of Masked Singer Australia, and gee, ten episodes is really quite a lot of episodes. You could really feel it this time, as the guessing panel completely gave up early into the show. It must be very tiring saying “who are you?” for several weeks of taping on end — but, in the words of Rose McGowan, imagine how tired we are.

Not that tired, though: Masked Singer‘s not cracking the 1m views it was at its start, but it’s still up there in the top 10 shows for its nights, and easily remains one of Ten’s most popular offerings. By last week, about 100,000 people are tuning in just for the reveal at the show’s end — and this week, the judges seem to zone out a little, too.

There’s a real ‘last week of school’ energy to this episode: when Hughsey guesses both of The Veronicas on stilts and the idea is seriously entertained and then Jackie O guesses ‘pepa’ to the ‘salt’ of his guess for Unicorn, it’s clear that no-one really cares about the foreplay anymore. Lindsay Lohan doesn’t even bother guessing.

We just want those reveals: off with their heads! And we got one: Kate Ceberano, the scientologist with a daughter named Gypsy who has a great voice and a warm spirit. Love.

Let’s Guess, Someone May As Well

Monster

LiLo has another revealing moment on the show during Monster’s clues: when Monster says they’d offer anyone a place to sleep, Lohan is incredulous, saying “who would do that?!?!”. She’s learnt to not help — otherwise you might end up making headlines for live-streaming your own attempt to kidnap Syrian children.

😢😢😢Is the person behind that mask OKAY!?!?! #MaskedSingerAU pic.twitter.com/4clWBooaHK

— Kyle and Jackie O (@kyleandjackieo) October 14, 2019

Anyway, Gorgi Coghlan must really like Bridget Jones’ Diary, because this Monster is here for the Renéesance and will be seeing a midnight LGBTIQ ally-only screening of Judy!

Has Coghlan performed at the MCG for an AFL grand final? I thought we were done with the sport references and refuse to look it up, but asked a friend and they Googled it for me. She did, in 2003.

Dave Hughes wants to ‘Netflix & Chill’ with Monster again: from inside sources, I have been led to believe it is Hughsey’s fringe that is making him incredibly horny. If we cut it off, the true Hughsey returns. Who is bold enough to be up to the task? Carly Rae Jepsen will be here in November — hopefully she brings her sword, though by then, it may have grown too strong.

Spider

This was the one contestant I’ve been 50/50 on, but this week has tipped me away from Jessica Mauboy, as Jackie O guesses, and towards Paulini.

It’s the ‘moment of truth’ about singing in a Papua New Guinea dialect that sways us over: Paulini sung a requiem in a dialect in 2010, while on the TV show Sisters Of War.

The Olympic clues work for both Paulini — who sung pre-Idol in a Sydney Olympics event, as a child — and Mauboy, who performed at the 2010 Summer Youth Olympics. Still, if we were hedging our bets, lets say Paulini… for now.

It’s a shame the other contestants aren’t this hard: it’s quite fun not knowing.

Wolf

As Lohan points out, Wolf’s clue about going through “a stage” suggests that he’s a stage actor, like an actor — this blows the thing wide open. It could be anyone: Rob Millsy Mills’ ‘ArtPop could mean anything’.

Speaking on behalf of Lady Gaga, that was a wonderful cover of ‘Shallow’. The panel all stood up when he went into falsetto, which felt like a genuine reaction: it was really good! Stream Wolf on Pandora Radio.

His ‘moment of truth’ clue mentions walking 100kms in a day; we couldn’t find that specifically, but did find a Charity Walk page he set up last year.

Unicorn

Forcing Deni Hines to sing the family friendly version of Cee Lo Green’s ‘Fuck You’ is a failure — it is political correctness gone mad, it is artistic freedom destroyed.

The clues continue to lock her in. She’s stood behind the world’s greatest diva (either her mum, or Kylie Minogue, who she did backing vocals for). She’s travelled with the elements, aka Earth, Wind & Fire (as Lohan points out!). And leaving dancing behind either refers to her 97′ remix album, or Marcia’s cover of the Donna Summer song, ‘Last Dance’.

The ‘moment of truth’ about a brother in Texas has us at a loss, though we’re sure it refers to a former collaborator.

Lion 

Dave Hughes wants to suck Kate Ceberano’s toe, pass it on!

Surprisingly Lion is not LiLo, even though a clue seems to reference her first single, ‘Confessions Of A Broken Heart (Daughter 2 Father)’. Let’s use this as a chance to revisit the song’s frankly way too dark film clip, where Lohan’s dad shouts at her mum and LiLo breaks down in a bathtub while the paparazzi circle. Yikes!

Robot

Robot lives to dance another day. Out of all the contestants, Masked Singer might prove to be the best career move for Cody Simpson.

If I know anything, it's that #MaskedSingerAU has highlighted how good Aussies are at circling things on WIkipedia screenshots.

— Osher Günsberg (@oshergunsberg) October 14, 2019

As a child-star, he needs the anonymity to wade off pre-judgement — behind the mask, he’s revealing raw talent. We’re beginning to think he could even win: it’d be the cleanest narrative for the show. Tween star gone independent, who needs the show to lose the shackles.

This week, people were ‘shocked’ by an insider report that Masked Singer‘s eliminations are ‘rigged’, meaning the audience votes count for nothing and the elimination order is pre-determined according to who is the most famous. This is obviously true, which makes it more likely that of all the singers, Robot could win.

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Masked Singer Australia airs on Channel 10/Win at 7.30pm Mondays and Tuesdays, and is available to stream on 10 Play.

Jared Richards is a staff writer at Junkee, and co-host of Sleepless in Sydney on FBi Radio. Follow him on Twitter.