Macaulay Culkin Re-Visited His ‘Home Alone’ Character 25 Years On And Holy Shit, It’s Upsetting
"It's fucking Christmas and they forget their eight-year-old son..."
In the same way that Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is actually about a deranged middle-aged man desperately clinging on to any last vestiges of his youth and sanity, and Beauty and the Beast is about a woman being held hostage and eventually falling in love with her captor, the Home Alone films aren’t really as fun as you remember them. At their core, they’re about a young boy being maliciously attacked by criminals after being casually misplaced by arguably negligent parents. Twice.
Now, the films’ original child actor Macaulay Culkin has fully acknowledged this troubling plotline in the first episode of a new web series. :DRYVRS is created and written by The Moldy Peaches guitarist Jack Dishel and will star a bunch of celebrities in the role of various ride-share drivers. In this first instalment, Culkin is ostensibly a grown-up version of Kevin McCallister dealing with some serious trauma from his past.
“It’s fucking Christmas and they forget their eight-year-old son — their fucking eight-year-old son,” he says. “You’re all by yourself in the house for a week. I had to fend off my house from two psychopath home invaders. I was just a kid.
“I still have nightmares about this bald weirdo dude chasing me around, talking like he was Yosemite Sam. ‘I’m going to pull your fingernails out, I’m going to get you you little scamp’. They don’t even curse. They’re calling me ‘louse’ and shit like that. [My parents] remembered my batshit of a brother, but they forget me: the cutest fucking eight-year-old in the universe, by far.”
Hot tip if you would like some nightmares tonight: watch all the way through the credits.
