The Internet Is Gleefully Dunking On Gwyneth Paltrow’s New Netflix Lifestyle Show

In 2008, actress Gwyneth Paltrow decided to largely step away from her career in front of the camera, and launch a “wellness and lifestyle brand” that advocated putting jade eggs up yer hoo-ha. Thus, Goop was born.

Since then, Goop has become the easy punchline for a thousand comedians the world over, a case study in what happens when white women get too rich and too bored. Ya know there’s that old joke about cocaine: it’s God’s way of telling you that you’re making too much money. Well, Goop is the same thing, but for people who think liking Chardonnay is a substitute for a personality.

It also does real harm. Paltrow and her fellow Goopers spend a lot of time, energy and money trying to convince the public that the company peddles something more scientifically-verifiable than old fashioned snake oil. Which it doesn’t, of course: Paltrow’s expensive ‘remedies’ have been discounted by doctors time and time again.

But just because you’re the head of a spurious quasi-scam, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t get your own Netflix series.

And thus: The Goop Lab with Gwyneth Paltrow, a new reality series that aims to go behind the activated almond-scented curtain at Goop and find out what all the fuss is about.

The trailer is, we’ll be honest, pretty wild: it starts with Paltrow talking to sex therapists who host orgasm classes, peaks around a discussion of exorcisms, and ends with the Goop gang submerging themselves in freezing water.

Needless to say, given Paltrow’s habit of selling the public straight-up pseudo science, a lot of people are unhappy that Netflix has given her a platform at all.

KEEP THIS SCAM AWAY FROM US THANK YOU pic.twitter.com/iHMHep5SCN

— ayesha ✨ (@GirI0fSteeI) January 6, 2020

Goop is reigning champion in the competitive sport of white women who are wealthy enough to fund the creation of health and wellness issues.

— Charlotte Clymer🏳️‍🌈 (@cmclymer) January 6, 2020

I guess it was inevitable that Goop would eventually use being "unregulated" as a selling point instead of a thing she's been fined $145,000 for by state regulators https://t.co/Dj3IyjU8X9

— Anna Merlan (@annamerlan) January 6, 2020

In fact, some are even urging an informal boycott of the show, to stop the further spread of misinformation.

Y’ALL BETTER NOT HATEWATCH THE GOOP sHOW THAT IS HOW WE WILL GET MORE GOOP SHOW

— Alicia Lutes (@alicialutes) January 6, 2020

And then there are those keen to turn the whole thing into a giant meme.

i was working in the Goop Lab late one night https://t.co/IKyBp8H1d1

— blaine capatch (@blainecapatch) January 6, 2020

Excited to announce I'm partnering with Gwyneth Paltrow on a male-focused counterpart to Goop called "Gunk."

— Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) January 6, 2020

"Today in the Goop Lab I'm gonna vaginally inject 2 cups of pulverized raccoon bone to prevent a condition I call "The Lazy Lady". Then we are opening up my abdomen and stuffing it with full of magician grade scarfs soaked in essential oils. This is science. I'm a scientist." https://t.co/iLigBnUHoP

— Level 9000 Ya-drew Druid Drew Davenport (@The_Davenporter) January 6, 2020

Dr. Grant, my dear Dr. Sattler… Welcome, to The Goop Lab pic.twitter.com/yAEtj1w7bR

— Patrick Monahan (@pattymo) January 6, 2020

if your date doesn't say "welcome to the Goop Lab!" when they take off their clothes don't have sex with them.

— david ehrlich (@davidehrlich) January 6, 2020

Guess we’ll find out how deep this particular rabbit hole goes when The Goop Lab drops in full on Netflix on January 24.