RIP Kevin: Fortnite’s Favourite Mysterious Cube
Fortnite, the latest video game to bear the brunt of children’s fascination and parental concern, loves to do weird shit with its map. In the latest development, a glowing, spinning cube that had been present in the game since August exploded, sending players to some sort of digital Heaven.
Fortnite, a Thunderdome in which 100 people enter and one person leaves, is currently one of the most popular video games in the world. The mysterious cube, affectionately nicknamed ‘Kevin’ by fans, has been rolling about the Fortnite map ever since it arrived in a flash of lightning.
Like a drunk Viking, Kevin traversed the landscape leaving mysterious runes and property damage in its wake. The cube has had a marked impact upon the map, demolishing Tilted Towers in September before submerging itself in Leaky Lake and rendering the body of water purple and bouncy.
However, this week players have had to say goodbye to Kevin.
At around 5AM yesterday, Kevin was levitating above Leaky Lake, glowing purple and spinning as it was wont to do. Then the spinning began to speed up, the glowing increased in intensity, and Kevin exploded in a flash of light.
Players who had gathered to watch the spectacle were transported to a mysterious white dimension, where they floated above geometric lines leading down to the area the cube had previously occupied.
Glowing blue crystalline butterflies fluttered about the players, and while it was beautiful, it also looked like the type of dimension an AI might create to convince us that it’s benevolent.
After a minute or so the butterflies alighted on players’ fingertips and transported them back to the normal map – several thousand feet above the ground. Fortunately, players were equipped with gliders and umbrellas, enabling them to Mary Poppins it back to the safety of the bloodbath.
Leaky Lake now has several new islands, but what or where the strange butterfly dimension was is not yet clear. Personally, I’m hoping it’s proof Heaven is real, and that our sweet purple cube finally made it there.