First-week feels at uni

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Aaannnnddd we’re back. Here’s a virtual clap on the back for making it through your first week of uni. Wasn’t it just spectacular? Personally, there’s nothing I love more than attending a 9am tute and introducing myself over and over again.

So to help you relive the memories/pain, here’s week one in five stages.

Stage one: The walking dead

You tried to go to sleep early the night before, or maybe you just accepted that three to four hours was all you needed on a Monday morning. But really, the moment you sat down in your very first lecture of the day and listened to the soothing voice of your lecturer, you found yourself slowly drifting off while maintaining a guise of being fully alert. Congrats if you’ve mastered the art of sleeping with your eyes open.

Stage two: F.R.I.E.N.D.S

So you’re in your first tute and you know no one, but you’ve maybe met this one person and can’t remember their name. We’ve all experienced this; that one person you had more than one class with and never spoke to, but who is now your closest thing to a friend. So, now’s your chance! A little bit of sussin’, a little bit of awkward eye contact, and then wham bam, you’ve got an awkward smile and a “Hey, weren’t you in my class last sem?”


Stage three: Hello, my name is Bruce

It begins… “Let’s go around the room and introduce ourselves, what we’re majoring in, why you’re studying it… I know this can get tedious so we’ll jazz it up a bit. Tell us your favourite movie!”

At first it’s fun and results in a few awkward chuckles as you wait your turn. You even try to come up with something witty or cool to say, but by the end of the week, it just becomes boring AF.  


Stage four: I’m still alive but I’m barely breathing  

You’ve somehow made it through most of the week. You’re sleep deprived, you’re outfit repeating, and you don’t even care about making friends anymore. You just want to go home, but after checking your timetable, you nearly cry when you realise you have to sacrifice two more hours to another tute.

But it’s worth it, because you get tomorrow off and that’s all that matters. So you battle through, waving goodbye to your friends as they head home, internally sobbing as you contemplate on leaving campus for some fancy food or having sushi for the fourth time this week. You capture the moment on Snapchat with the hashtag #CREYS and then realise it’s only 10.30 in the morning.

You wouldn’t have even been awake a mere week ago.

Stage five: Hold on, we’re going home

You’re done for the week both literally and mentally, and you no longer give any f***s. You push through crowds, you push back buying those textbooks to next week, and you even skip out on going to the bathroom. You just want to go home, and nothing can get in the way of you and that pre-dinner nap. Even thinking about it causes a yawn to ripple through you.

Nothing can get you down now – not even week two. 

Steffanie Tan

Steffanie is studying a Bachelor of Journalism at Monash University.

Image: hackNY.orgFlickr Creative Commons license