RuPaul’s Drag Race Recap: Don’t Jush Me ‘Cause I’m Close To The Edge

Bring back my girls..again! Who could have thought we would have been blessed with not one, not two, but THREE seasons of RPDR in the one year. It’s a once, twice, three times a lady miracle in the year of our LAWD, twenty-gay-teen.

Thankfully, we’ve had a bit of breathing space since All Stars 3 ran hard into Season Ten(se), and this untucking time has allowed for some much-needed optimism and hope. Could AS4 redeem the franchise before the year is out?

Let’s find out, and get this recap a cookin’!

The Drag Race Queens

While AS3 was cast with a unhealthy mix of “oh..them?” AS4 seems to have got the balance right when it comes to casting the right mix of legacy queens, redemption queens, and next-gen popular queens.

In the legacy category, we have Latrice Royale and Manila Luzon, who entered the workroom stunt queen-style, a la BeBe last season. This is Latrice and Manila’s second go at an All Stars, after they competed as a team in All Stars 1, and it had some younger queens shaking in their man-size lady-boots.

As a noted Drag Race scholar, it is my learned and informed opinion that the AS4 crown belongs to Latrice. The reasons are varied, complex, and based entirely in facts-are-facts, Australia. Latrice is the big beating heart of RPDR legacy queens. She’s also bona fide drag race royalty, a Miss Congeniality, a top four from the intensely popular Season Four. TBH, she should get a spot in the hall of fame for this lip sync alone.

Latrice would also be the first plus-size queen to ever snatch a crown, and of all the “big girls” to have graced the RPDR stage, she would be a fitting and deserved queen to earn that bragging right. Also, the Drag Race Hall of Fame sure is looking a little… pale. Could it be time that an African-American queen earned a spot in that illustrious line-up?

The only other AS4 queen who could match Latrice in the legacy stakes, crown-wise, is Manila. Like Latrice, Manila is a firm fixture in the Drag Race superstar firmament. She came second-place in Season Three and has ingratiated herself in endless Drag Race specials as a queen who give great talking head (no complaints).

Manila isn’t as dearly beloved as Latrice, though. Her bitchy streak is as noticeable as the one in her wig, and those who remember Manila’s turn in Season Three will recall her role in the Heathers clique. However, Manila turns it out on stage — her runways are campy genius, and her lip syncs are the stuff of legend.

However, AS4 isn’t all about the legendary. It’s also about the children. There are some young, hungry queens in the mix who are adored by the next-generation fanbase who were too young to catch the show’s golden era. The most adored and controversial of those queens has to be Valentina. If I were a gambling man, I’d place a bet on Valentina as a potential winner.

Valentina is crazy popular, her fans behave more like gamer gate trolls than RPDR fans, and she has captured the hearts and minds of the show’s Latinx audience. Alongside Farrah Moan and Naomi Smalls, Valentina represents the favourites of a new generation of fans who are seem more impressed by the look than the narrative. Raised on Instagram stories, these are fans who prefer the filter-friendly Jenner sisters over those ancient crones, the Kardashians.

The Challenge

This episode was a return to format for All Stars. First up was the reading mini-challenge (Latrice won, just like AS2 winner Alaska. FORBODE!), followed by a variety show in which the queens showed off the special skills they wouldn’t otherwise get to display. For Valentina, this was literally just lip syncing but given her iconic “I’d like to keep it on please” fail, she certainly had something to prove. The top and bottom queens gave us a LOT to think about.

Oh Farrah, you loveable failure. It seems anytime you get put on the mainstage to perform, something goes awry. From her limp Kylie Jenner and your so-so Snatch Game, to her Michelle Visage roast (I have to fast forward it every time I watch), Farrah Moan has made stumbling her brand, and this week she took it literally as she fell on her bott-bott during a burlesque performance that was more nah-nah than va-va-voom. Even though it landed her in the bottom two, Farrah is getting a sympathetic redemption edit. She will be around for a couple more eps yet.

Prediction: Trinity is going to be the BenDeLaCreme of AS4. Talented, seasoned, knows exactly what Ru wants and how to give it to him but somehow falls between the two stools of what Ru is looking for in an All Stars winner. Regardless, her tucking skit was lit and her clap backs during other queens reads in the library challenge showed she do have nerve. Trinity earned her spot in the top two, and I think she’ll be in the top two again soon.

It’s the Heart of Season Ten, Monique Heart. Facts are fact, America: the ooh-ah sensation is here to remind you that brown cow = stunning. Did you know that Monique Heart, the heart of Season Ten, is the ooh-ah sensation who mistook giraffe print for cow print and thought it was stunning? Oh you did? That’s probably because the loveable underdog Monique Heart has seemingly been replaced by some sentient catchphrase AI that was built entirely from Drag Race memes. Ms Heart did very well this week, but like Monet Sp-onge, she had better mix it up, or it’ll be the stun gun for this brown cow stunner.

There was no way Jasmine Masters making it to episode two after that performance. Not since Farrah’s gag about Michelle Visage’s dick breath stinking up the stage has a joke about sex-breath bombed so terribly.

The Lip Sync & The Lip Stick

We’re back in the All Stars format, which means the winning queens are lip syncing for their legacy and sending home one of the bottom queens with a lipstick bearing their name. This week, Trinity The Tuck and Monique Heart got to be the first two queens lip synching for their legacy. Can I get an amen for VH1 budgets, because this week after ten seasons, three all stars, and a Christmas special, we got our very first Mariah Carey lip sync.

This was SUCH a great lip sync to start off what is shaping up to be a great season. Trinity managed to keep it turned out whilst giving us something new, performing the number in a form-fitting gown. Monique, meanwhile, redeemed herself after she ruined the first and only Carly Rae Jepsen lip sync. (I’m not bitter, just white-hot with rage.)

By redeemed, I mean she knew all the words this time, and didn’t attempt any cartwheels from the House of Little Athletics. She did, however, remove her wig AGAIN. This time at least she got it stuck in the lighting rig, but Ru wasn’t having it. Trinity won the lip sync and Monique got told to invest in some duct tape to keep that shake and go firmly un-shakeable.

That meant that Trinity had decide if Jasmine or Farrah was being sent home. In a move that surprised no-one, Jasmine was the first All Star to sashay away. Jasmine is the lowest-placing queen to make it onto an All Stars, and her post-Drag Race fame has been off the back of her meme-ability and iconic Vine vids. It was a little surprising to see her on the show, considering one of the things she is most famous for boldly declaring that “RuPaul’s Drag Race done fucked up drag.”

Then again, seeing her fail and flop after accepting the invite to come back on the show, maybe Ru knew exactly what he was doing….Ruvenge is a dish best served within the safety of your own personal media empire.

NEXT WEEK: it’s the return of Miss Stacy Layne Matthews, henny. If you don’t know her, you will. Also, Gia Gunn’s days are numbered – you don’t go that hard as the bitch in an All Stars and live to tell the tale. All Stars is about redemption for the fuckups and legacy-building for the superstars. Trust and believe.

See you next weekend, you psychological females!

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Nic Holas has written for The Guardian, Sydney Morning Herald, Archer Magazine, and Hello Mr. You can find him on Twitter @nicheholas, or in his role as co-founder of HIV movement The Institute of Many.