Culture

These Dickheads Getting Stuck On Uluru Might Be The Most Satisfying Story Of Our Time

"Getting stuck on Uluru is the Australian equivalent of putting a native american headdress you bought at a festival on so tight you cant get it off."

by Matilda Dixon-Smith  20 September 2016
uluru

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Instant karma can be pretty satisfying: like when you climb a sacred Aboriginal site you are expressly asked not to climb and then get stuck. That’s right, three Idiots Abroad just got stuck on Uluru after bypassing the restricted area at the site and attempting to climb the sacred landmark.

The three men have now been rescued after an eight-hour operation to retrieve them from Uluru, where they veered off a designated pathway and got stuck in a crevice like a trio of frozen nuggets.

The men, all 22, were rescued by Northern Territory Police, Fire and Emergency Services in an overnight operation. They didn’t sustain any injuries and weren’t dehydrated as they had adequate water with them. A medical professional who greeted them at the base did say they were “quite hungry” though.

Sure, we’re glad these guys are okay, but there are a whole host of reasons why you’re not supposed to climb Uluru (all spelled out pretty clearly in a sign at the rock’s base), so we can’t help but feel a sense of grim satisfaction at the instant payback bestowed on these guys for choosing to climb.

The traditional custodians of the land, the Anangu, request that people do not enter the sacred site or climb Uluru, and instead instead enjoy the landmark by walking around the base. The sign at the base reads: “We, the Anangu traditional owners have this to say: Uluru is sacred in our culture. It is a place of great knowledge. Under our traditional law, climbing is not permitted. This is our home.”

Aside from the sacred cultural significance of the site, as custodians, the Anangu feel responsible for the safety of anyone who does climb — which is dangerous and often ends with people getting injured or killed. And fair enough.

This isn’t the first time people have gotten stuck on Uluru after climbing against advice. Last year a Taiwanese tourist had to be rescued after getting stuck in a crevice. These incidents are not just painful and upsetting for the Anangu people, they’re also a huge resources drain for the Northern Territory Emergency Services.

“It’s a huge effort for the NTES volunteers,” a spokesperson said of the “avoidable” incident. “It’s wear and tear on equipment and it does cost a lot of money.”

So… how about no one climbs this sacred Indigenous site anymore, eh? Great? Great.

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Feature image via CSIRO/Wikicommons.