TV

Last Night’s All-Women ‘Q&A’ Was A Reminder Of How Good The Show Can Be

The topics ranged from sexual assault to body shaming to (of course) Donald Trump.

by Tom Clift  7 March 2017

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This post discusses sexual assault.

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If you tuned in to Q&A last night, there’s a good chance you were pleasantly surprised. There was no shouting. No name-calling. No fringe right wing hack spewing hateful, ignorant bile. Instead, viewers were treated to a respectful, intelligent discussion about the issues confronting the world today. In short, it was nothing like Q&A, and it was great.

The fact that there were no politicians on the episode probably had something to do with it. But what was more telling about the makeup of last night’s panel was that it was comprised entirely of women.

In light of the roster, the decision to keep Tony Jones on as host raised some eyebrows on social media. Previous all-women episodes have been hosted by female ABC presenters like Annabel Crabb.

Still, in comparison to what the show is usually like, last night was absolutely stellar. In an episode that tied in with the Sydney Opera House’s All About Women festival, Icelandic writer and anti-violence campaigner Thordis Elva was joined by Malaysian-Chinese-American journalist Mei Fong, American author Lindy West, music journalist and TV presenter Faustina Agolley, and former chief advisor to the prime minister on Indigenous family violence Josephine Cashman, for an intersectional conversation that ran the gamut from sexual assault to fat-shaming.

Elva, who has dominated headlines in recent weeks for her controversial public talk in which she shares the stage with the man who raped her, spoke about her assault as well as the concept of forgiveness.

“Forgiveness is not dependent on the perpetrator’s remorse,” she told the predominantly female audience. “Forgiveness was never ever for him. I think it’s an extremely misunderstood concept. People somehow think you are giving the perpetrator something when you forgive, but, in my view, it is the complete polar opposite. Forgiving was for me, so that I could let go of the self-blame and shame that I had wrongfully shouldered that were corroding me and basically ruining my life.”

While applauding Elva for bravery, Cashman cautioned women against following her example in reaching out to their rapist, warning that it can in many cases contribute to “a perpetual cycle of domestic violence”.

“The best place for the offender is to go to court,” she said. “It is great that we have got a panelist here who has risen above, but are we opening the floodgates for rapists to contact victims? Because I know a few of them are really dangerous people.”

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“I am one of the millions of people whose case fell through the cracks of the legal system,” responded Elva. “Very many people don’t feel safe within the legal system, and don’t see justice fulfilled.”

Asked why her attacker should be praised just because he was willing to speak publicly about what he had done, Elva replied that “it’s not about applauding a rapist. It’s about a rapist giving voice to the immeasurable hurt that he caused. And in my view that is an antidote to some of the normalisation that we’re seeing today in this discourse.”

“We’re seeing the most powerful man in the western world say that sexually assaulting women is a part of men’s culture and locker room talk,” she continued. “We’re trying to flip that narrative.”

The panel also touched on the thorny subject of revenge porn and victim-blaming. “Why is it that as a society we immediately dismiss and minimise the actions of someone who is committing a sex crime and jump immediately to blaming the victim,” asked an audience member.

“We need to shift the conversation,” said Elva. “We need to shift it from the victims, from analysing what they wore, or who they trusted, or what their sexual behaviour was, over to the people who are actually perpetrating any kind of sex crime.”

“The most productive thing we can do is keep hammering away at rape culture, at this entitlement to women’s bodies and women’s privacy,” added West. “What needs to change is the idea that there’s anything I can do to force someone to commit a crime against me.”

Lindy West also spoke about the issue of body shaming, following a question about the line between promoting positive body image and good health.

“You can’t take good care of something you hate,” she said. “Allowing people to live in their bodies without shame, and without constant apology, is the only way to empower people to take care of themselves.”

“People don’t have to be healthy. People don’t owe you health. People own their own bodies and their own lives,” she added. “Give fat people the permission to live, to just live their lives and be happy and be vibrant and not think of themselves as a broken temporary thing, as a thin person who is failing.”

Of course it wouldn’t be Q&A without a little bit of Trump, courtesy of an audience member who asked about recent bills signed by the president that encouraged NASA and the National Science Foundation to promote careers in science, technology, engineering and math (STEM) to women and girls. “Does this delegitimise the constant rhetoric that came from the feminist movement during the campaign labelling him as a misogynist?” asked the questioner.

“It is not up for debate whether or not he is a misogynist,” replied West. “He is a confessed sexual assault fan. He has openly admitted to grabbing women by their genitalia.”

“Everything about Trump is worrying for me,” added Agolley. “I’ve spent a significant amount of time in the States, and being a woman of colour I now feel very much like a moving target.”

If there any Q&A producers reading, please take note. We’d like a lot more this sort of thing, please and thank you.

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If you or someone you know is impacted by sexual assault call 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732 or visit 1800RESPECT.org.au. In an emergency, call 000.

Men can access anonymous confidential telephone counselling to help to stop using violent and controlling behaviour through the Men’s Referral Service on 1300 766 491.

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Feature image via Faustina Agolley/Twitter