Vladimir Putin Has Released A 2016 Calendar Of Himself, Because Why Wouldn’t He?
2016 looks powerful and muscular.
Vladimir Putin, Russia’s president and perennial ‘Man of the Year’, has had another big and objectively successful year. He’s expertly dodged the listening powers of highly skilled spies, snuffed out any remaining pesky rights to freedom of expression and scored eight goals in an ice hockey match that he won with sheer prowess alone.
To celebrate — and to generously reward his populace’s undying loyalty — he has released a 2016 calendar featuring himself on all 12 pages in varying poses and scenes. Called ‘All Year With the President of Russia’, it went on sale for a measly 78 roubles (about $1.50) just in time for Christmas, when Russians are solely looking for gifts which honour their glorious champion.
Got my Mum the Putin 2016 calendar ? – they'd run out of Cliff Richard ones. pic.twitter.com/kyfsd3MZxA
— Tony Shepherd (@tonysheps) December 24, 2015
Each month’s picture — which range from strong and shirtless displays of power, to soft and sensitive demonstrations of fondness for puppies — is accompanied by an enthralling quote from the president, such as, “No one will ever get military superiority over Russia. Our army is contemporary, capable, and as they now say, polite, but formidable.”
BBC’s Steve Rosenberg managed to nab a copy of this unbiasedly excellent piece of memorabilia, and the resulting screenshots are a testament to Putin’s far-reaching and almighty influence.
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If the photos look familiar, it’s because you’ve already seen them in every corner of the internet, simultaneously mocking and propagating the muscular and immortal leader. These photos are essentially approved memes, and you love them with the fire of a thousand suns.
For the unwavering follower who has everything, there’s also this new men’s perfume inspired by Putin, called Leaders Number One. If it doesn’t smell like the sweat produced from brutally slaughtering two bears at once, I will be sorely disappointed.
Meanwhile in #Russia: sales of new perfume "Leaders Number One" started ($80). Note: inspired by #Putin pic.twitter.com/mh1ZTou1ER
— Russia Direct (@Russia_Direct) December 24, 2015
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