Culture

Zookeepers Are Recreating The Raptor-Training Scene From ‘Jurassic World’ Because They’re All Loveable Dorks

"STAND DOWN, FIERCE BEASTS!" the heroic zookeeper bellows at the fearsome chickens.

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Ever since the gloriously stupid trailer for the gloriously stupid Jurassic World dropped in April, the internet has been a slightly more tolerable place to spend one’s time, if only for the blessed convergence of Hot Andy and poorly-rendered CGI dinosaurs that is now so easily accessible. Jurassic Kittens, childhood remakes of the original, Polish dudebros pranking Chris Pratt — all are magnificent, but none quite reach the wondrous, boneheaded heights of that scene where Trainer Man wrangles three bloodthirsty Velociraptor like Steve Irwin’s buff cousin.

That scene, for obvious reasons, is a fan favourite — it should’ve ended with Chris Pratt being nonchalantly disembowelled and eaten, but you can’t have everything in life. People like it so much that, in fits of childlike wonderment, zookeepers everywhere are recreating it using slightly less threatening animals. It is absolutely adorable.

“STAND DOWN, FIERCE BEASTS!” the heroic zookeeper bellows at the fearsome chickens. “YOU WILL TASTE NO MANFLESH THIS DAY.”

“Mum! Look, I’m — I’m doing the thing from the movie! Mum! You’re not watching!”

Wait, that last one is actually impressive — rhinos are the size of a minibus and their faces are literally swords. That one can stay.