While You Were Sleeping, Some Dude Thought It Was An Okay Idea To Slap Beyonce’s Butt
Also, weirdly, other things about butts.
Bubble Butt, Bubble-Bubble-Bubble Butt
Major Lazer’s new single ‘Bubble Butt’ has just received the music video treatment from Eric Wareheim, one-half of comedic nutcases, Tim & Eric. Featuring a crazy list of guest stars including 2 Chainz, Tyga (esteemed resident of ‘Rack City’) and, uh, Bruno Mars (?), the clip is definitely all about butts. Once the insane imagery of giant-assed superhero butt injectors finally leaves your brain, you’ll no doubt be left singing that chorus all day, but probably wishing you weren’t. (note: potentially NSFW; don’t watch it on public transport anyway, unless you’re not easily ashamed).
Speaking Of Butts, Beyonce Will Throw Yo’ Ass Out
At a concert in Copenhagen last night, some much-too-comfortable dude thought he was Jay-Z for a second or something and gave the Queen B a slap on the butt after she let him join in on a rendition of ‘Irreplacable’. Well, obviously, nobody touches Queen B’s ass without her permission. Here’s a stupid sideways video where you can clearly hear the singer saying ‘I will have you escorted out of here’, and then the crowd went “Ooooooohhhhhhhhhhh!”, like your friends do whenever another friend calls you out on that time you got drunk and accidentally hooked up with their mum (oh wait, that’s just a sub-plot from American Pie, nevermind).
In other Beyonce-related news, there’s been another Destiny’s Child reunion! (of sorts). Beyonce and Michelle Williams (ie: the other one) appear as guests on the new Kelly Rowland slow-jam, ‘You Changed’. As far as we can tell, it has absolutely nothing to do with butts.
There’s A New Bridget Jones Book On The Way
The third installment of Helen Fielding’s bestselling series will be called Bridget Jones: Mad About The Boy. NBC’s Today Show scored the scoop, including the following excerpt, which details the, uh, topical etiquette of drunk texting:
Wednesday 24 October 2012
11.27 p.m. Just presss d SEND. Iss fineisn’t it?
You see, this is the trouble with the modern world. If it was the days of letter-writing, I would never even have started to find his address, a pen, a piece of paper, an envelope, a stamp, and gone outside at 11.30p.m. to find a postbox. A text is gone at the brush of a fingertip, like a nuclear bomb or exocet missile.
DATING RULE NO:1
DO NOT TEXT WHEN DRUNK
So, yeah. Still, can’t be any worse than that scene in the second movie where Bridget ends up leading a Madonna singalong amongst a bunch of inmates in a Thai prison. That was weird. The book is due out in October this year.
Women’s Basketball History Was Made
Women’s basketball has long been the butt (OMG) of jokes over its apparent lack of excitement (well, mainly on Family Guy and other such nonsense for dipshits), but those criticisms should probably get buried once and for all this season. In her first ever pro game, Phoenix Mercury’s rising phenom — the 22-year-old, 2.03-metre tall, Brittney Griner — was a human highlight reel.
Only two women have ever dunked in a pro basketball game before — the iconic Lisa Leslie and, most recently, Candace Parker — but Griner’s already done it twice. IN HER FIRST GAME EVER. That’s incredibly impressive. Meanwhile, I burned both pieces of my toast this morning. [via Buzzfeed]