Watch This Guy Get His Erect Penis Stuck in Some Train Doors
If that's the kind of thing you're into.
There’s no reasonable explanation for this. A video recently uploaded from Sao Paulo, Brazil shows a man board a rush hour train with a raging erection, thrust his pelvis forward as the train prepares to disembark, and wilfully let his dick get crushed by the subway doors.
Though it’s being “reported” — let’s not kid ourselves, this isn’t journalism — as an unfortunate mistake by NY Mag, the guy in the video clearly knows what he’s doing. The clip starts with him and a friend laughing about it. Either he’s had some kind of awful loss of sensation in his genitals and this is now the only way he can get off, or that’s not really his penis. Right? RIGHT? Make up your own mind.
This isn’t even the only news about penises on trains this week. Some awful human recently tied a used condom to a handrail on the F train in New York, and Gawker have reported that three weeks later it’s “still fucking there”.
Is this a thing now? Please say it’s not. Junkee can totally get behind cat videos and cartoon films about dogs who like hot chips, but having to do a weekly round-up of dicks on trains is some next level bullshit.
Keep it in your pants, fellas.