Culture

Someone’s Made A Grindr Profile For The Guy Who’s Getting Divorced Over Marriage Equality

This whole thing hasn't really worked out as he planned.

It’s been less than a week since Nick and Sarah Jensen announced their plan to divorce if marriage equality was passed and it’s really not gone very well. In case you’ve been lucky enough to miss it, it all began when Nick detailed his thoughts with great solemnity for Canberra City News (a publication which ordinarily deals in stories of broken public water features and new YMCA management of the local pool).

“My wife and I, as a matter of conscience, refuse to recognise the government’s regulation of marriage if its definition includes the solemnisation of same sex couples,” he wrote. “If our federal parliament votes to change the timeless and organic definition of marriage later on this year, it will have moved against the fundamental and foundational building block of Australian society and, indeed, HUMAN CULTURE EVERYWHERE.”

I added the caps to better express exactly how much I assume he was maniacally foaming at the mouth when he wrote them, but you get the gist of the overall argument:

At the end of his now-infamous piece, Nick argued that many other Christians would no doubt follow in his footsteps and reject state-sanctioned marriage completely. He remained steadfast that this was their only logical option and they “are not alone”. But there’s been very little evidence of this since.

In the course of just four days, Nick has been widely ridiculed online, criticised on live televisionuninvited from his Christian friend’s wedding, and his story has made headlines around the worldThough he now works as the director at the Lachlan Macquarie Institute, his old employers at the Australian Christian Lobby took this as an opportunity to erase his name from their site, and his own brother even wrote a piece in opposition. “I love and respect you brother,” he said. “[But] on this issue I believe you are wrong. It’s time for marriage equality.”

For everyone other than Nick and Sarah, this hasn’t come as much of a surprise. Most polling figures suggest that around 72 percent of Australians now support legislation for same-sex marriage and even those who don’t aren’t necessarily sold on the idea of a tantrum-divorce. In fact, so many Christians have argued against him that Nick’s had to write all-new pieces for religious publications to explain himself.

Observant opponents of the idea have also noted that to see this promise through, Nick would have to separate from his wife for 12 months before seeking an actual divorce. And, because that’s something he really has no plans of doing, people are starting to really push for it. A Facebook event called Celebrating Nick and Sarah Jensen’s Divorce now has nearly 104,000 people behind it.

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“They have decided that being married together in a country where it’s legal for a man and a man to marry, or a woman and a women, is just too horrible,” wrote the page’s creator Jesse Mount. “They’d much rather be divorced and I think we should all support and celebrate in their decision when the date finally does come. We sure hope there won’t be any backing out on their behalf as hundreds upon hundreds of gays and gay rights supporters come to rejoice in the parting ways of these narrow-minded citizens.”

Others have added him to dating sites under the impression it might be some time until he finds someone else who can put up with his “sense of privilege” and “6am animal sacrifices”.

Now, to keep his options open, another kind soul has made him his very own Grindr profile.

He’s roaming around Sydney right now, unsurprisingly looking for something with no strings attached, and in case you were wondering: he’s a bear.