Someone Has Invented An Alarm Clock That Wakes You Up By Slapping You Repeatedly In The Face
Science has gone too far.
Waking up is the hardest part of the day, and also arguably the worst aspect of existence on this rotating ball of molten rock. There is no good way to wake up, and anyone who tells you otherwise is a liar and probably a thief.
That said, some ways are better than others; sulking in your jim-jams is mildly more pleasant than having water thrown in your face. happily, though, science has found a way to make the waking up process as actively unpleasant as possible. Scientist, inventor and YouTuber Simone Giertz has made a stack of videos chronicling her bodgy, lovably useless inventions, including an extremely questionable automatic toothbrush and the Chordio, a very impractical iPhone case that turns your phone into a shitty guitar.
Her latest and greatest (worst?) creation is The Wake-up Machine, a rejigged alarm clock that wakes you up by slapping you rapidly and repeatedly in the face with a motorised rubber arm. It looks terrible.
Giertz was also the mastermind behind the infamous Breakfast Machine that you may have seen doing the rounds on Facebook over the past week. It’s no robot tomato sauce sprayer set to the 20th Century Fox theme played on recorder, but it ain’t half bad either.