Film

JK Rowling Hates You All, Dodges Chance for ‘Harry Potter: Kid Detective’

It could've had Dobby as his wisecrackin' sidekick!

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If you were after more trips back to the world of Hogwarts, Butterbeer, Patronus charms, He Who Must Not Be Named, dead parents and yelling about how Harry and Hermione should’ve ended up together, then too bad. Harry Potter writer, philanthropist, anti-independent Scotland supporter and tax paying-enthusiast JK Rowling has revealed plans to continue spending the foreseeable future writing about a Muggle detective rather than her much-loved whiney orphan wizard.

For those who slavered over the new Potter chapter, as well as the news that Rowling was working on the script of Potter spinoff Fantastic Beasts and Where To Find Themthe news that the writer is instead focusing on the detective skills of Afghan War veteran-turned-private-dick Cormoran Strike is like missing your chance to get to Platform Nine and Three-Quarters.

Her crime fiction series — written under the pen name Robert Galbraith — already contains The Cuckoo’s Calling and the recently released The Silkworm, and according to the BBC, she is planning to write more Strike books than the seven that make up the Potterverse.

Rowling told the crowd at the Harrowgate Crime Writing Festival that her plans for Strike are “pretty open ended” and that the series will be bigger than Potter, saying “It’s not seven. It’s more.”

Interestingly, Rowling could’ve simply done that with any number of aspects of the Potterverse; turning Ron Weasley into some sort of magic-war-veteran turned wizard detective, for instance. Or even head into Teddy Lupin’s future. (Wait. Actually, that’s an awesome idea.)

But whether it be her recent comments about the long-term viability of Ron and Hermione — Romione, as the Potter ‘shippers call it — or that the ‘Robert Galbraith’ pseudonym was a chance for Rowling to see if a book of hers would sell on its merits, rather than on the strength of her name, Rowling seems content to leave off writing more Potter novels. Considering it’s the best selling book series of all time, and spawned a massive eight-movie franchise with more to come, hey, it’s not like she needs the cash.

One thing we can all agree on? Rowling should definitely deliver the Potter series from Draco Malfoy’s perspective.

Jaymz is a New York-based writer, super-yacht enthusiast, hi-tech jewel thief and Bengal tiger trainer. He tweets at @jaymzclements.

Feature image via The Telegraph.