Two Brisbane Comedians Have Served Up A Brilliant Pisstake Of Australian Coffee Snob Culture

Personally, I love coffee. I can’t get enough of it. I love a bit of a sip on the ol’ java, the good bean juice we all enjoy. Give me coffee and plenty of it, that’s what I say. Brew me up a big batch of that sweet beanwater and I’ll suck it down. Just suck it right on down, and I don’t care who knows it. Mmm hmm!

Alex “Coffee Lover” McKinnon, that’s what they call me. The Brewster. Old Coffee Fiend McGee. The Man Who Enjoys A Good Coffee. These are all my legal names as my mother and father laid down, and if you don’t like it, friend, well, you can go and have a nice day.

Truth be told, I’m thinking about coffee right now. As we speak, I’m imagining a big, piping hot cup of delicious coffee — a real humdinger of a brew — and in my head I’m chugging that coffee right on down my throat into my belly. Right on down in there. It’s a nice image, I don’t mind telling you. A ripper of a thought. Coffee in my mouth and in my belly, that’s the name of the game, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

All day all night coffee, that’s my motto. Coffee all the time. Any hour of the clock is coffee o’clock in my opinion. I know there are folks out there who disagree, and to them I say: relax! Have a coffee! Life’s too short to argue, especially when you could be having a scrumptious cup of good coffee instead, am I right?!

“Coffee: the best drink”. Those are the last words my father said to me before he died, and by goodness if he didn’t hit the nail on the head. Coffee is the best drink. If it’s not coffee, send it back. Just send it right on back into the kitchen and say “Look here, this isn’t what I ordered! I ordered a coffee!” If that doesn’t get you a coffee, then you’re in the wrong place, pal.

I guess what I’m trying to say is…I just love coffee!

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Fair Dingo, the comedy duo who made this video, live here and here.