Life

Here’s Why Not Getting What You Want Is Actually A Good Thing

As Queen Bey once said, “If everything was perfect, you would never learn and you would never grow".

You might have failed another university subject, were rejected by your crush or missed out on that dream job opportunity. Whatever it was, we’re guessing you’re feeling really down in the dumps. Before you know it, everything can pile up, and the glory of university can accumulate into one big nightmare.

As trashy as you might feel, we don’t think you should give up hope just yet. Sometimes not getting what you want straight away can be the best thing for you.

Welcome To Reality

For many of us, university is your first taste of adult life; everything is brand new. You can’t expect to nail your first essay, tax return or blind date on the first go. Chances are you’ll stuff up big time, but most people will too. As Queen Bey once said, “If everything was perfect, you would never learn and you would never grow”.

Learning how to cope with failure is an important skill to have in life, and most things usually take a couple of attempts to get right. Wouldn’t it be better to learn how to rebound while you’re young?

Your Friends Have Your Back

At university, you’re as popular and social as you’re ever going to be. You have all your old school friends, your new university friends, plus your work mates, soccer team, band members and flat mates.

These valued friends and family aren’t just there for the good times; they also want to help you through your tough times, just like you’d help them. Don’t be afraid to let them know that you’re struggling, and they’ll be there to pick you up and make sure you’re better off once you’re back on your feet.

University Is Structured To Give You Fresh Starts

At university, you run into people in various stages in their life, but at the end of the day, you’re all equals learning the same information to earn a degree. In my first year, I met a 17 year old from Brisbane, and a 50 year old looking for a fresh start in a new industry, but we all still had to pass the same foundation unit for our degree.

You can have a bad semester (who am I kidding, you can have as many as you need!) but you’ll always come back at the start of a new semester with a clean slate. University gives you a chance to find your feet and discover who you are and how you work. No one’s going to judge you for your mistakes.

You’ll Be Motivated To Do Better

We always strive for success, but it’s often our failures that we remember the most. All that built up frustration and disappointment may make you feel resentful, but you can take that energy and turn it into positive and constructive action.

No one likes a sulky, disgruntled 20-year-old. If you’re devastated after a failed subject, use your frustration to study more extensively and passionately than the last semester. If you’re romantically rejected, turn that sadness into motivation to become an even better person.

It’s only human to have a burning desire to improve, so exploit that and become a better person because of it.

Failure Often Opens Up Different Pathways

When we’re driven to reach a target, we sometimes forget to consider the alternatives that are out there.

Failure often opens up pathways that we would not have considered otherwise, and often lead to a better result for us. A mate of mine dropped out of an accounting course that he loathed, and is now thoroughly enjoying a career in primary education.

Don’t be scared of failure because it often reaps better rewards.

Jared is a second year Law/Music student at Monash University. He loves finding ways to save a spare dollar here and there, to fund his love of the Melbourne music scene.