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The Weekly’s Charlie Pickering Has A Message For ISIS: “Don’t Try And Out-Dickhead Us”

"ISIS is like The Real Housewives of Sydney, only less of a threat to the fabric of our society."

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The Weekly‘s Charlie Pickering has a simple message for anyone hoping to strike fear into the hearts of everyday Australians.

“[Senator] David Leyonhjelm said ISIS are dickheads,” said Pickering, referencing this week’s terror attacks in London and Melbourne. “But we’re Australians. We’re a nation of dickheads. You can’t out-dickhead us.”

“We go to hardware stores for the sausages,” said Pickering proudly. “We jump in croc invested waters to impress backpackers.”

“You think you can overthrow our government? We had five prime ministers in five years. We don’t need your help. Our governments overthrow themselves.”

Describing ISIS as “the global equivalent of a coward punch,” Pickering said that it was time to stop letting the terrorist group take credit for things. “Imagine Sandra Sully saying ‘ISIS want to claim responsibility for this attack, but they can go fuck themselves’,” he said. “All they want is attention. They’re like The Real Housewives of Sydney, only less of a threat to the fabric of our society.”