Well, that sure was an election.
A month-long rampage of “not-bad-looking daughters”, social media snark, and politicians falling all over themselves to appeal to the voters of Western Sydney and Brisbane. And while you might have foreseen how things would end in the House of Reps, there could be no predicting the Senate results – namely the array of minor parties like the “pleasantly surprised” Australian Sports Party, who will now be weighing in on issues like the Carbon Tax and Gay Marriage, and other national concerns completely outside their political wheelhouse. (“Are you more interested in Sports than Politics?” their website asks. “Then the Australian Sports Party is for you.”)
While we step tentatively into the first few days of an Abbott Government, let us remember the election that was through the medium of song.
1. Dan Kelly & The Alpha Males: ‘Election Night’
You can’t have an Australian election playlist without this song. It pretty much says so in the constitution.
2. LCD Soundsystem: ‘I Can Change’
“I can change, I can change, I can change” — the Australian Labor Party, 2010-2013
3. Pauline Pantsdown: ‘I Don’t Like It’
Pauline Hanson, brought to the NSW Senate by minor party preferences!
4. Jonathan Richmond and The Modern Lovers: ‘Government Centre’
No song more accurately reflects the excitement of Canberra outside of election season than this one.
5. Jay Z: ‘Dirt Off Your Shoulder (Danger Mouse Remix)’
Danger Mouse’s 2004 mash up of Jay-Z with The Beatles’ ‘Julia’ feels like an apt way to remember former Prime Minister Gillard.
I hope she had an alright weekend.
6. Andrew Bird: ‘It’s Not Easy Being Green’
Cheer up, Christine Milne and co. You didn’t do as bad as everyone said you would.
7. Miley Cyrus: ‘We Can’t Stop’
There’s no way we can remember this election without remembering the man who may not have twerked his way into the Prime Ministership, but certainly did twerk his way into our hearts: Clive Palmer.
8. Blink-182: ‘Dammit’
9. The Ying Yang Twins: ‘Wait (The Whisper Song)’
This one goes out to the original ladies man, Prime Minister Tony “Sex Appeal” Abbott.
10. Radiohead: ‘Electioneering’
Thus concludes the playlist of Election 2013. See you in three more years. On whenever that double dissolution happens.
11. Hidden Track: Amanda Palmer’s ‘Tony Abbott Song’, feat. Die Roten Punkte
Performed last night at Perth’s Astor Theatre.