A Foolproof Guide To Actually Having Fun This New Year’s Eve
Hot tip: stay home.
Brought to you by Telstra
This article is bought to you by Telstra. Download the 2015 Sydney New Years Telstra app to stay on top of what’s on.
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If you’re over the age of 18, enjoy fun, friends and not working, then this — the two spindly weeks you get off at the backend of the year — is probably what gets you through the other 11-and-a-half months.
The halcyon summer days strung between Christmas and New Years are like a flimsy length of Bunnings fairy lights and, as Christmas is now just the day where your mum cries because no one appreciates her and you get to disappoint everyone you love with terrible panic-gifts, New Years carries with it a fair bit of pressure to be great.
Here are some tips on how to make the most of it:
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Forget Leaving The House
Every bar, pub and club will have a minimum $20 cover charge and a line to the bar 50 dudebros deep. House parties are the only way to go, and if you’re particularly crafty/lazy you will know enough of the Mad Max hellscape that is NYE public transport to just have said house party at your own gaff.
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Pick A Theme
Everyone pretends they hate theme parties but they secretly love it. Especially if you come up with a really good one like ‘Come As You Were’ (where you all dress up like yourself as a teenager and can score a ride home of your parents without being judged) or a Recession Dressin’ party (where your outfit can’t cost more than $5). John Hughes-themed parties and cocktail parties (where you have to dress as a cocktail) also lead to some pretty great photos.
The more specific the better; I had a ’80s Amanda Vanstone dress-up party that slayed.
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Boxing Day Booking
As humans essentially have brains like goldfish, they’ll rarely remember more than the first NYE invite they get and they’ll remember the last NYE invite they get. Nothing in-between. Since you’ve left it this late, shoot for the latter, set up your Facebook event around the 26th or 27th and make it super jazzy.
Promise things you definitely can’t come good on: petting zoos, celebrity guest appearances, a vodka fountain. Whatever it takes.
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Give Your Neighbours A Heads-Up
A handwritten note slipped under their door the day before works best. It seems more personal and leaves less opportunity for reply or protest.
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Deep-Fried Tequila Shots
Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? These tiny morsels of joy will make your party completely (un)memorable!
WHAT YOU’LL NEED:
- A whole sponge cake
- Tequila
- Oil for frying
- Powdered sugar for dusting
HOW TO DO IT:
- Cut the sponge cake into small cubes
- Dip ‘em into the tequila (the longer the dip the stronger the bite)
- Fry them in boiling oil until golden on each side
- Let them cool on a paper towel and then dust with powdered sugar
- Regret all your life decisions
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Disco Cheese
Edible glitter. Wheel of brie. The end.
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Share The Fun With Friends Who Are Away
This year there’ll be a live-stream of the world-famous Sydney fireworks both through the Sydney NYE Telstra App and on Youtube so that a) you can continue to not go outside and b) you can Skype your whole party, replete with fireworks, to your friends overseas.
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Crowdsource Your Resolutions
Have everyone write down a happily achievable resolution like “This year I will learn how to drink whisky neat” and put them into a hat to be drawn by another guest.
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Pre-Book Maxi Taxis In Shifts
Book one lot for 12.50am and another for 2pm — everyone is either on staying to help clean up in the morning or on their own.
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Set up a live stream so everyone to enjoy the fireworks no matter where they are!